Back to Bristol

Back to Bristol and back to reality today.  A very harsh cold reality!  Ernie reckoned it was about -4 degrees when I arrived back.  Soooo cold!  Yet, not too bad, once snuggled up inside and the heaters on for a few minutes and the kettle on for some nice warm horlicks.  Yeah, I'm warmed up and cosy now, but there's so much to do - I haven't bothered unpacking yet, and I need to wash and dry my hair and get an early night.  The unpacking is so clearly not going to happen tonight!  I'll just do the essentials for now and give it some welly tomorrow evening.  At least I didn't have to worry about feeding myself, as Sarah did that for me when I popped round to say goodbye.  And that was Christmas and the holiday season, gone!  My tree is still here, the one final reminder that Christmas has been and gone in such a blur. 

And now, back to cold early mornings.  Yuck!  So not looking forward to having to get up in the cold tomorrow, but I'm sure after I've done it for a couple of days, I'll get back into the swing of it, so I should really stop moaning.  It's good to be back!

Finally getting to eat some turkey

Yay, made it out of bed for the entire day today - I feel like progress is being made.  Even if I felt like a zombie for a significant proportion of that time!  And I even got round to eating properly, although as you may expect, with a bunged up nose, taste wasn't a big experience! 

My family and I went round to my mom's cousin's and his family for a lovely lunch of turkey curry (it is the quini-essential British thing to do with leftovers, isn't it?).  I had a serious appetite on me today after having barely eaten for two days and managed to enjoy all of the wonderful food on offer, and got to spend some lovely quality family time with everyone, something which I've also missed out on the last two days.  Again, I don't think I was really a full participant of the occasion, spending most of it sniffling, blowing my nose and feeling exhausted.  But I'm really glad I did it, was beginning to miss out on having company and it's always very important for my parents to be able to spend sometime with the whole family together (my older brother also lives away from Derby and makes it back even less than I do), even if it is just a token event.

I'm really starting to feel restless, I was really hoping to make the most of my time here in Derby, but with a cold, I feel kinda out of commission, as a lot of my friends have small children and even for those who don't, I don't really want to be going round infecting them, or making them paranoid that I'll be infecting them, and I don't know how much fun it would be for them to spend time with someone nursing the back end of a cold.  I'm hoping that tonight will be the first really good night sleep I've had since before Christmas Eve, but this will make it even more frustrating if I'm feeling rested but still coughing and sniffling.  I suppose that I could always get really stuck in with my knitting (good progress being made - now measures 17cm vs yesterday's 7cm, which may not really sound like much, but I was out most of the day!) or maybe go to the cinema as there's a couple of things on which I wouldn't mind seeing (Sherlock Holmes, Nine, Avatar) but they're both things I could do when alone in Bristol, and makes it all seem like such a waste of my valuable Derby time!  And I know I definitely don't want to be hitting the chaos that is town, because I don't really have the money to be spending and whilst I'm getting better, still don't think I will have the energy to tackle the crowds, and the lack of money (going full circle here) kind of makes it pointless.  Ohhh what to do, what to do...  I actually don't know why I'm getting so longwinded about this all here, I really should just have a proper think about it in the morning once I've had some sleep.  I'll aim for a nice lie in and then a good old bath and hair wash, drop my brother off at the train station around noon and then see how up for facing the world I really am.  This sounds like the most wise plan right now!  So off I go!

Another day spent (mainly) in bed

Oh dear, this Christmas is turning out to be a bit of a write off for me!  I've just spent most of another day in bed, feeling a little sorry for myself whilst the rest of my family trasped off to my grandparents for yet more festive feasting.  I'm feeling much better with regards to the gastro today, and although I have eaten a bit today, I've been taking things rather carefully as my gut is still not 100%.  But instead, today's ailment was a cold.  Yes for those keeping score, another cold, about three weeks since the last one!  I'm beginning to think that there maybe something wrong with my immune system, but having said that, most people I've been around for the last few days have had a cold, including my poor mum who is exhausted with hers, so maybe it's hardly surprising that I've come down with something.  And this one seems (touch wood) much milder than the last cold I had, even coming hot on the heels of a dodgy tum, so hopefully I will be able to recover quickly, especially as tomorrow we are supposed to be going round to some more family for yet another meal.  It would be nice to make at least one of the Christmas weekend family gatherings!

I did managed to get myself out of bed by midafternoon, and I was determined not to go back as I really would like a proper night's sleep, something I didn't get round to having last night, mainly I think, due to having slept so much yesterday.  So, fingers crossed on that account.  This time out of bed was mainly spent watching mind numbing t.v. and Wallace and Gromit - soooo cute, I love that movie, those little bunny rabbits are so ruddy adorable!  I have made a slow, half-hearted attempted at my next knitting project, but I'll update more when I've got beyond the current 7 rows!  And now, off to bed for a good night sleep, hopefully!

Mmm, spent Christmas just as I needed to, but not as I expected to!

Merry Christmas everyone.  I hope that you all had lovely days with your loved ones and that you had wonderful pressies and tasty food. 

I spent most of the early hours of Christmas day in the bathroom with a lovely dose of D&V, so I unfortunately spent the vast majority of Christmas day in bed asleep.  I went downstairs for about half an hour for pressie exchanging, and then briefly to talk to my ouma and oupa in South Africa on Skype.  And that was about it.  I would have felt dreadfully unsocial if it were not for the fact that I actually slept most of the day!  And also didn't really want to give everyone else gastro as a delayed Christmas present.  I do feel slightly guilty that I didn't really feel enthusiastic at present time, I really did love my gifts, just didn't really feel energetic enough at the time to express that!

Now that I have given them all away, I can put up some pics of the Christmas presents that I have spent the last month working on (oh, and Emma's birthday present).

 

Slippers made for Morgan (red) and Jenna (pink).  They're made out of 100% wool, and Sarah has since felted them (which I was very impressed with, can't believe she found the time already!) thus they may look ginormous here, but they have shrunk alot.  I will get photos of the finished items when I can.

The quwerky present I mentioned and showed a teaser of was this - a dodecohedran, a.k.a. a twelve pointed star, with each point a different colour.  It was a great way to use up some of my odds and ends, and was very happily recieved by Emma on Connor's behalf, as were these socks, which should just about still fit:

Then carrying on the sock theme, I made Rowan a set of three colour co-ordinated but non-matching socks, which hopefully should fit:

Then to use up some of the wool left over from Rowan's aran cardigan, I made Sarah some wrist warmers (awww, bless, potential for co-ordinating mummy and daughter!).

 

 And finally, Emma's scarf.  This I actually crocheted for a change.  It was one of my favourite wools that I've used so far.  It wasn't the softest of wools, but it is 100% pure wool that has been hand spun and hand dyed in such a beautiful colour set, with plenty of green.  I love that it has such a natural feel to it (in fact spent a lot of time during making it picking out little bits of twig and straw) and the fact that it is truely a unique wool, with varying thickness and colours.

Apparently, more days can be like that!

I have so many wonderful things to talk about that happened today.  It was a truely special day, filled with love, friends and Christmas!  I do have some photos, but I don't think I'll get round to putting too many up just yet, as it's getting late (damn that Shakespeare in Love being on so late!) and it is Christmas Day after all, so will need to be up relatively early, and be full of energy, so that amounts to tonight's post being much shorter than it could be.

I finally got paid and did my Christmas shopping today - what a nightmare, but I'm so glad it's over and done with.  So I won't bother saying very much about that.

Then this afternoon, I spent some time with the Clarks and the Symes at a children's church service, complete with crafting - I ended up with lovely multi-coloured hands.  It was lovely fun crafting with the girls, you can totally let your inner child out and not have people judge you!  Awesome, messy, colourful, beautifully unperfect (bye-bye inner control freak!) fun!

Afterwards we all headed back to Emma's house, as it's her birthday today and Sarah made us all a lovely meal.  It was a perfect evening.  Children running round, all excited about various pressies, catching up, making Ems feel special, crafting (well, I was finishing off the last of my Christmas pressies), giving and recieving of lovely, thoughtful gifts.  Truely a special day.  Made all the more special by Connor laughing (and such a gorgeous, beautiful laugh) for the first time when I nuzzled and blew onto his tummy.  Wonderfully witnessed by both his mummy and daddy he repeatedly showed off his new party trick.  It was a wonderful time, and I'm so blessed to have been part of it.

And finally, one picture, because it's too cute to resist!  A smiley Connor with his Mummy.

Merry Christmas everyone!

Aw, why can't more days be like this?

Despite my early attempts at going to bed, I had a rubbish night sleep.  This consisted of dozing off about 1am and then waking up with a start following a really horrible, distressing dream at just before 3am.  And then I was too wired to go back to sleep.  It took ages to calm down, and it was the most upsetting dream I've had in a very long time.  After a while, I completely gave up trying to get back to sleep and instead watched stuff on my laptop for a couple of hours and then eventually was able to go back to sleep.

Needless to say, this morning it was very hard indeed to wake up and get out of bed.  I had set my alarm for 9am, but that came and went with repeated snoozes, until I decided that I would get up, so switched the alarm off and promptly fell fast asleep again.  Until I had a lovely wake up call in the form of Sam phoning to let me know how her job interview had gone.  Since she didn't fancy being alone following this, I took my mom and Sam to the chaos that was the supermarket to do the last of the grocery shopping that my family needed.  We're having an extended family Christmas at our house, and as always, my mom is making sure she has enough to feed an army and then some!  I was very relieved to leave the supermarket, although admittedly having the company of two people I love very dearly certainly made the experience more enjoyable.

Just after lunch we found out that Sam got the job!  Yipee!  I'm so very proud of her, she very much deserves it, and I know it's something she's wanted for so long now.  So it was a very positive day.  I eventually took Sam home and had a cup of tea and kept her company for a little longer, but the poor lass was exhausted from all the excitment, so I left her be and went and found people with more energy - little people!

I popped in to see my darling Sarah and her wonderful family, and thoroughly enjoyed every moment.  It was wonderful being in a home with children at this time of year.  Christmas is so exciting, and it's so easy to catch their enthusiasm.  I had a lovely catch up with Sarah, and had a chance to spend a little time with each of the girls and have a cuddle.  This little family means so much to me and brightens up my life so much, I am so lucky and privileged to be part of their lives, and spending time with them is a very important aspect of helping me remember about the life that still exists outstide my little medicine bubble.  Thank you Sarah! :)

And just to prove what amazing friends I have, I have recieved two early Christmas pressies today.  Both of which contained some beautiful wool!  Hehehe!  They know me so well, especially Sam's comment that she was worried that she was enabling me!  I will get round to putting pics up at some point, but needless to say, I am so excited and can't wait to have a sit down and decide what to make with it.  I think I may even make something for myself for a change.  And as well as the wool, I got a lovely new piece of art to stick up on my wall when I get back to Bristol from the Clarks.  It is so wonderful and pretty, and I'm so touched to have something original and handcrafted with so much love and time put in.  Thank you all very much for my lovely presents, you have truely made me feel special and thought of.

Back in Derby - yipee!

Hurrah!  I am back, safe and sound in Derby.  It's good to be back, and to know that it's a special time to spend with loved ones, be it family or friends.  I did manage to get a good solid four hours sleep this morning after my last posting.  And then really struggled to get going, bed was so cosy and lets face it, four hours sleep is not a full "nights" sleep.  Fortunately, I had managed to sleep on my break at work, and because it was fairly quiet, we had nice long breaks.  We sneaky sneaky used some of the beds in unused parts of the ward, so it was decent sleep as opposed to lying across some raggedy looking lumpy chairs in a staff room! 

I had planned to pack yesterday, but the day had somehow got away with me following all the snowy drama.  I had been organised enough this morning before sleeping to jot down a packing list, as I always forget something, so was proud of that little bit of organisation as being organised is not one of my strong points!  So in a flurry, I threw everything in a suitcase (packing not being one of my strong points either!) and was about to rush out the door when I remembered I hadn't done the dishes.  Damn!  So another delay meant all in all, I left quite a bit later than originally planned. 

The roads were lovely and clear, except the icy side road I had parked Ernie in.  I was really surprised that I completed the journey in two and a half hours, which was really good progress, as I did stop briefly for an espresso and some crisps, and the traffic being rather crazy at times and going all ridiculously slow!  And of course what would a trip on the motorway be without idiot drivers trying to do you harm?  I really wish they could hear my shouts and mutterings sometimes.  Not letting me in off the slip road when the slip road is rapidly running out is not safe driving practice.  Fortunately, it was a double laned slip road and I was able to pull over into the left lane when my lane ran out completely (luckily there was noone there at that precise moment), but could the idiot who didn't let me in not see what a dreadfully dangerous situation he was putting me in?  But stress over, I'm here in one piece and ready for the festivities.  Just had a lovely quiet evening in with my parents, catching up.  And now, although I feel relatively exhausted, my body clock is still on night shift mood and feels ready to go on staying awake through the night.  So I'm going to go lie in the darkness and hope sleep isn't too illusive!

Jupiter and Haloumi Salad

Had quite a busy day, and it was lovely!  I spent the afternoon making Christmas cards, as a way of using up some of the leftover crafting stuff from the Christmas decorations.  It was wonderous fun and I was really pleased with the results, especially as I didn't really have any ideas or inspiration.  Lovely little organic, see where the mood takes you kinda thing.  I can't really show all of the cards, because they haven't reached their destinations yet, but I have given a few to my Bristol friends:

For Harry (and Claire) who loves red and black

For Mary and Paddy

 

And speaking of my Bristol friends, we went out for dinner tonight.  In the past, we've usually done a Christmas meal at someones house, but it's a lot of effort, and none of us really have a big enough place anymore.  So we went out for a lovely meal instead, tonight being the last night before Christmas that we could all make it.  It was really nice, and everyone was in high spirits.  My eyes were somewhat bigger than my stomach though, and I came home with half a mushroom-free jupiter pizza, which will make for great lunch tomorrow.  I still can't believe that Christmas is getting so close now.  It's strange, I've been preparing Christmasy stuff for ages now, but now it's a week away!  Crazy!  When did that happen?  The only downer on the night was the sub-freezing temperatures.  So cold, crazy!  When did that happen?

Mary and I wanted to get a picture together, but out of six attempts, none where great, so I put the worst, most qwerky one here.

Mulled wine and friends

Just a quickie, because I'm really tired, and have a pounding headache.  And I've already posted today, so it's not as if I'm breaking my run of daily posts.  Here are my lovely Bristol friends, managing to get together and have a great night of chatting and catching up.  I love all these people so dearly!  They make me laugh, and feel carefree.  They understand about my life as a medic and the allure of uni, and being young professionals.  They give me such wonderful support and are just fantastic friends.  I'm a truely lucky girl to have such amazing and varied friends, from those shown below to all the others that touch my life in one way or the other.

Sarah and Sam to the left, Mary (middle) and Claire















(Right to Left) Rachel, Liam, Jess and Rob

Harry, looking wonderfully happy with life - his usual photo pose

Oh Christmas tree, oh christmas tree!

Yay, FINALLY got organised enough to do this:

 

 

 

 

(Sorry, not the best pics ever!  Bit out of focus, but you can get the idea!)

Still have a couple of decorations that I need to let dry and pop on the tree, and I'm still debating if I should make a star for the top, and if I should (decorate? and) use the snowflakes I made a while back with Mary.   I'll get it all finished eventually! I was so excited to finally get it up.  It really feels like Christmas is getting close now.  So seasons greetings everyone! 

I've almost used up both the balls of wool I brought yesterday, and I've discovered I'll need another one.  Bugger!  I only justified getting this wool (which is gorgeous and I lust after everytime I go to the wool shops) as I thought, although quite expensive, I'd only need the two.  Now costs have just gone up by 50%!  But I don't really mind as it is gorgeous, so pretty and vibrant, I'm fairly sure that it will be adequately loved by the eventual recipient and I'm so happy with how it's worked up so far. (I'll put up pictures after the intended has recieved it.) Ohhh dear.  Seems like my wool addiction has got the better of me... again!

And thank goodness it's Friday.  I'm just so ready to get this week out of the way.  I'm much, much better now, just mainly the sinus headaches that are bugging me now.  I've got quite a busy weekend ahead.  I really, really need to tidy my flat - vacuum, recycling (for some reason, when I put my recycling out, it doesn't get picked up, so I end up storing it up and then taking it to the local supermarket), tidy away the crafting stuff (ready to make more decorations next year.  Yipee!).  I also have two shifts at work, which I really am grateful about, because my MOT is due in the next couple of weeks, so any money will be coming in handy!  I'm just hoping I won't be feeling to lousy or headachy because that would just make for very long, horrid shifts.  And finally, one of my old uni friends is coming to visit us in Bristol, so Mary has arranged for a mulled wine and mince pie evening at hers tomorrow night.  Just a bit annoyed that it clashes with work - why can't I actually have it all?  So I'll make a mad dash from work and probably be about an hour and a half late!  Just hope I have the energy for all this, the way I've felt this week makes me feel a little worried about this.  But I'm determined to give it a go!

Progress is being made

Not a completely wasted day for a change.  I forced myself into a really early bedtime last night, in bed just after 11, which is hours earlier than I've been managing.  Actually manage to get a good night sleep, better than the last week or so, but still not perfect.  I was awake fairly early this morning, but still didn't manage to get on the go till lunchtime.  I'm still getting nasty, sinusy headaches.  This morning I did a bunch of catching up on emails that I've been neglecting and trying to organise myself.  I headed into the hospital just after lunch, but I never got as far as the wards.  My head was just so fuzzy and not in concentrating mode.  I didn't think that I would make much sense over the course of an hour long clerking.  So I did some research that I've been meaning to do for the last week whilst I was off, and I got a new swipe card, something else that I've been meaning to do for a while.  I was a bit annoyed at myself for not having clerked, but I do feel that I was pro-active about other stuff, and this was a huge improvement on the last few days.  So, only a small "yay!".

I also got paid today.  Not much, as it was only one shift's worth, but enough to justify giving myself a treat, so I went shopping for my Christmas tree, and did grocery shopping, hopefully enough to see me through to Christmas holidays, and got some more wool (lalala!) for a special pressie for someone special.  And I stupidly decided to treat myself to a trip to the cinema.  Boy, did I regret this.  I picked Orson Welles and Me, and it was the closest I've ever come to walking out on the cinema.  I nipped to the loo and totally didn't feel like I was missing out!  I only stayed because I thought that since I spent the money, I should stick it out.  Mmmm.... Zac Efron may look pretty to some, but I really didn't rate his acting!  The story was slow and didn't really hold my attention.  Well, that'll teach me!

So, tomorrow's course of action - clerk!!!  (Mary has found me someone who she says is pretty good.)  Tutorial in the afternoon, then all things Christmasy in the evening - decorating my tree and my cake.  :)  Can't wait!  Glad to be finally getting round to it! 

1st of December - one day, many meanings

I can't believe that today is the first of December, already!  Where has the year gone?  It feels like I've just got used to writing the date as 09, and now I've just got 30 short days of that left.  Arghhhh...  Scary stuff.

Today is "special" for many reasons.  The first, is that it's World AIDS Day. And of course, in this day and age it's so incredibly important to be aware of this and the global impact it has.  Whilst it may not always affect us as individuals, we have a social responsiblity and obligation to not forget.  Maybe it's because I'm a medic, maybe it's because I grew up in a country where it was so prevelant, maybe it's the nugget of social conscious that I have, but for me, AIDS is a huge issue.  Going on my elective last year to South Africa, to a rural(ish) hospital where HIV was the cause of a huge proportion of the work load, it was such an eye opener to the problems it causes.  And this isn't just the health issues, there's the stigma, the financial and the social aspects to the disease too.  The fight for getting anti-retrovirals to those who need them most is one of the biggest issues facing healthcare in the modern world.  And with their help, we can really help people fulfill the the catchphrase - Living with HIV.  And how people are HIV-positive in the truest sense, i.e. it's not an automatic negative thing.  And on top of getting meds to those who need it, we need to get education to those who need it, which is basically everyone!  So on this one day of the year, remember.  Remember the 80 000 people living with HIV in the UK alone, and the millions more who have lost thier lives due to this evil disease. 




And then the second significance to this day is that it is the start of Advent.  Well, that is according to Advent calenders.  This is something I don't usually do, probably because I never remember to get a calender in on time.  Of course, true Advent would have started on Sunday, being four Sundays before Christmas day.  There's a certain elegance and grace about lighting those four candles in preparation and contemplation for the day that is so special and significant to Christians everywhere.  So happy Advent everyone, regardless of it's meaning to you!

Anyhows, about my day.  I didn't have to productive day that I was originally aiming for.  Mainly because I seem to have come down with a bit of a cold, so I've had the whole sore, scratchy throat, sneezy, headachy, achy feeling going on.  Not dreadfully bad, just felt very lethargic.  So went into my teaching (bit of a waste of time, was boring as hell!) and then came straight home, bemoaning the short walk from the bus stop, as my limbs felt like they weighed a tonne!  So, aiming for a lovely early night, and hopefully get a good night sleep, following drugging myself up!

Christmas decorations!

As I've mentioned in earlier blogs, over the last week or so, I've been accumulating random beads, card and ribbons with the intention of creating some Christmas decorations.  I didn't really have any idea of what I was going to do.  I had spotted some ideas in a hobbycraft (as in the shop) magazine, but didn't really like all of them, or want to do all of them.  My collection of oddments ended up looking a little like this:

So today, I decided that I should try make some progress on it.  I know that it's over a month till Christmas, so I shouldn't really be thinking of putting up a tree anytime soon... but there are several reasons I think it's justifiable to be thinking about making my Christmas decorations:
1) I live alone, so am responsible for no-one else's home asthetics!
2) I live alone, it's nice to have something to cheer me up, and what better than a colourful tree!
3) I live alone, so it's nice to have projects to work on to keep me occupied and not lonely
4) I live alone... have I flogged the "I live alone thing too much"?
5) It'll take me a while to make the decorations, so it's not like I'll be putting the tree up anytime soon
6) I won't actually be spending Christmas in my flat here in Bristol, I will be heading home to Derby.  So that means I miss about 3 or 4 days of the pre-Christmas period and some of the days after.  I need time to enjoy it!
7) Haven't got a tree yet, so will need to buy one before I can get too carried away....
Can anyone guess what I was thinking about whilst making my first attempts at decorations?  Speaking of which, here they are.  I've been making them very organically and just seeing where my hands lead me!  Any suggestions or ideas will be greatly received.

My swine flu jab is still giving me hassle.  Mainly just the local reaction.  I suppose that this is just my body mounting the necessary immune response.  But that doesn't mean I like the hot, red, tender lump on my arm, and the fact that my arm has been aching all day!  Grrr.  I've had the seasonal flu jab before, and it's not given me problems like this.  I was relieved when I was talking to some of the other Med Students today and they seemed to be having similar if not worse experiences.  I still say getting vaccinated is worth it, and I know that some of my friends don't really agree with the concept, I'm all for it!  It's for the greater good in my case, I'm around so many frail people that I wouldn't like the responsiblity of being a disease vector destroying my patients!  Also, worse case scenario, either in my capacity as a medical student or a nursing assistant, the NHS could be more heavily dependent on my services if swine flu really hits hard.  Just doing my bit, and in a selfish way, don't like being ill and missing things and feeling lousy.

Just another Tuesday

So, basically, this is my life. I just about made it in on time to my 10:30am teaching. Was on ECG interpretation. Had this topic to death, I know the basics, don't need people to come along and bore me with their "fail-proof" methods which are different from everyone else who has ever tried to teach me about ECGs. I know what I need to know, and I passed the ECG portion of the exams last year. Yes, repeating is boring.

Then I was good, I was proactive about life instead of leaving it all for the last moment. Those who know me, will realise this is very unusual. I could go on a rant about how this is a new start and I will be a better person from here on... but it wasn't anything nearly as fundamental as that. I just did some stuff that I had already being putting off for a while, and had some spare time. Simple as that. Still remains to see if being organised provides more benefit.

Then in another shocking turn of events I went to the library in the remaining spare time I had today. I flicked through books and looked some stuff up. I hardly ever step foot in libraries, and never this far away from exams. Is this the life other medical students experience?!? Have to be honest and say that I'm not that likely to return, was a bit disappointed in their range of books, and was mainly wanting to look at a book that I've been thinking about buying. They didn't have it, so I looked at some similar ones as alternatives and they didn't impress. I suppose that I could always just nip to the uni's med school library. I'm practically next door to the uni when I'm at the BRI. Would require me to have more time, but not much more. But it would be a nicer atmosphere. And it's always nice to look at the younger years and realise that I actually have come a long way, even if it doesn't always feel that way.

After my proactive hour, I had another tutorial. I rocked it. I rocked it in a very annoying manner, both for myself and for the other students. You see, I aced the theory/knowledge part of finals. I really worked hard for it. Going to tutorials where they're expecting you to have only the most basic of knowledge is very frustrating. There's only so many times you can blurt out the (almost all right) answers before it becomes awkward and everyone starts throwing looks of disguist in your direction. So I try to avoid this. But on the whole, we're a competitive bunch, us medics. It's hard not to show off that you know the answers! So I decided not to answer anymore questions. And the lecturer starts to do the whole "No, no one knows the answer. Well the answer is xyz, obviously" thing when met with a wall of silent and mostly blank faces to his questions. I'm thinking, well, I knew the answers, but people are getting bored and fed up of me answering. Don't tar me with the same brush as them. I know, I know. It's silly and childish. But this is how some of the tutorials make me feel.

Then I was naughty. Really should have gone to clerk. It wasn't late and I hadn't clerked so far today. But I couldn't be bothered. Not really the attitude I should be adopting. Avoiding the one thing I really need to be doing this year. But screw it... there's no valid excuse. It wasn't even a full blown case of "couldn't be bothered"sies. Just decided that I was actually looking forward to my walk home. It was a nice day. Simple as that.

Shouldn't really have decided that. Should have clerked, then taken the bus home. It's just toooo dangerous for me to walk home. Walk past far too many shops that I love browsing through. Was nearly two and a half hours. It should take max 45mins. Oh well. I've decided that I want to experiment with making some Christmas decorations for my tree this year. So I stopped at the bead store and spent ages trying to decide which beads looked vaguely Christmasy. The had to ask for advice regarding what sort of thread to use. Ended up with some silver-coat copper wire, various red, green, gold and wood beads. Have no idea what to do with them. Don't know when I'll know. Don't know when I'll get round to thinking about what to do! This is why it's dangerous for me to walk home!