Great news one and all! I have survived the day, sanity intact! And for the first time Ernie passed his MOT with flying colours, not even an advisory note in sight! I am relieved beyond words to not be forking out yet another small fortune to sort out yet another list of things found wrong at the MOT. Well, I say forking out, more like abusing the credit card and spend the next few months reliving the whole affair when the credit card statement arrived. And I suppose I should also remind myself that whilst I didn't have to pay anything at the time of the MOT, I did get the new back tyres a couple of days ago. Now if we can just survive until I start work, then this money thing will be less of an issue. Roll on August!
My day mainly entailed catching buses in the freezing rain. It was so cold this morning, after I had dropped Ernie off at the car doctors', I went to see Sam, and this meant getting into town. My cheeks were stinging with the icy rain falling on them, it was horrible. But I was very lucky that Sam was able to warm me up, good and toasty, with a lovely cuppa, food (steaming hot potato wedges - Sam makes the best potato wedges, she certainly has the knack! and choc cupcakes with lilac icing) and entertainment (in the form of Myst IV). Poor lass had to put up with my streaming nose, which the cold damp weather had set to full throttle. We also had loads fun hiding about three months worth of my toilet roll inners all around her flat for Kev to find. I hope we came up with suitably inventive and entertaining hiding spots for him!
And then it was back to the car docs to pick up the officially certified healthy Ernie. And after this I never really managed to warm up! I have been absolutely freezing all evening, much to my mother's great concern, who has been fussing over my chesty cough and my inability to warm up, and the fact that I feel absolutely exhausted, despite the best night sleep I've had in about a week and not the busiest day (but it's nice sometimes to be fussed over and feel looked after! Even if I am nearly 26). My feet have felt like icicles hanging on the end of my feet, despite socks and slippers and being tucked up under a fleece blanket folded over double. Brrr! I've kinda got the rest of me to stop shivering, but the feet are seeming to be a lost cause... oh well, hopefully, under two duvets and thick bed socks, come morning, things will have improved!
Thursday, 31 December 2009
Tuesday, 29 December 2009
Star Trekkin'
I had a very enjoyable day today of entertaining my friends and watching Star Trek. Was lovely and relaxing. We had a very lazy lunch of d.i.y. sandwiches, although Sarah ended up making most of them, and various chocolates and baked goods. I was very impressed with myself, I don't normally have friends round to my house in Derby, mainly because it actually isn't my house, it's my parents, and I'm always very conscious of the fact that my definition of tidy is greatly sub-par to theirs. I'm very paranoid that they'll get annoyed if I "trash" the house (worrying that my idea of "lived in" borders on their's of trashed!). Whilst yes, this is still some version of my home, I do feel more like a visitor here than a resident, I do after all, in a typical year spend less than a month in total here.
But I always feel bad about the fact that I'm always gatecrashing my friends houses, eating their food and creating havoc in their lives, and I never get to repay the favour. So I decided to rectify that. And the house survived, all in one piece, and I hope I didn't come off as too much of a control freak! So I'm really glad I did it. My folks house isn't really child proof, but I think we did alright and everyone had an enjoyable time (well I did at least, so hope they did too!), even if the girls got a little bored with the grown ups insistence at watching a long movie and wanting to see the tv screen!
I did get my camera out to document the occasion, but never got round to switching it on! Sometimes I really do need to remember that not every aspect of day to day life needs documenting, either in great detail or with visual aids. Sometimes it's okay just to let life happen and stop being so worried that I'll forget about all the good times! So that's all you're getting.
But I always feel bad about the fact that I'm always gatecrashing my friends houses, eating their food and creating havoc in their lives, and I never get to repay the favour. So I decided to rectify that. And the house survived, all in one piece, and I hope I didn't come off as too much of a control freak! So I'm really glad I did it. My folks house isn't really child proof, but I think we did alright and everyone had an enjoyable time (well I did at least, so hope they did too!), even if the girls got a little bored with the grown ups insistence at watching a long movie and wanting to see the tv screen!
I did get my camera out to document the occasion, but never got round to switching it on! Sometimes I really do need to remember that not every aspect of day to day life needs documenting, either in great detail or with visual aids. Sometimes it's okay just to let life happen and stop being so worried that I'll forget about all the good times! So that's all you're getting.
Lacking inspiration!
Hi! I'm not feeling very inspired to write my blog tonight. Which is strange, as for the first time in a few days, I actually have something to talk about! Oh dear! I'll blame the remnants of the cold that are still stalking me. Although as previously mentioned, this cold (thank goodness) has definintely hit me much lighter than the one I had at the start of December, and I am bouncing back much quicker. I'm all but over it now. Just a hint of lingering tiredness and bunged-upness.
After all my waffling last night about what to do today, I didn't really do any of it. I didn't get up early enough to have my bath and hair wash session, I did drop my brother off, and then I decided to get pro-active about sorting my car out. Unfortunately, it's that time of year again, when the ol' MOT is due. And last year, when I had Ernie serviced they mentioned his back tyres were looking rather worn, and could do with being changed, but when I got a second opinion, they said they wouldn't bother if it were their car, so being the skint student that I am, I didn't. But I have been aware of it all year, thinking all along that once I was working and had a steady income, I would sort it. But that plan went south along with all the others that started with "when I start working properly and have proper money, I'll..." So since my MOT was due later this week (booked for Wednesday, and dreading it, been stung too much in the past to have any other emotion about it!) I decided I'd get a jump start on things and sort out the tyres in my own time rather than being told and kinda forced into it due to a failed MOT. Turns out they did need doing (shocker!) and the silly garage seemed to think they could take advantage of me (even bigger shocker!) - "we don't have any budget ones (this being a nationwide chain that advertises budget tires from £20), we've run out, the ONLY ones we have would be £56... each." To which I pulled a huge face and got up to leave, genuinely shocked, and determined I could get them cheaper elsewhere. Then he shuffles around papers on his desk and goes "no wait, I've just remembered (mmmm, yeah right!) that we had a delivery earlier (are you kidding me?!? It's a Bank holiday, I doubt you'd have recieved a delivery on a Bank holiday!) and I do have some budget ones, but they're the best quality of the budget ones, and would be £81, including the fitting and alignment" This was somewhat better, so I gave in in the end, I tried the attempt to leave again thing, but this bargaining technique had apparently being exhausted!
After all this dirty, scamming, masculating stuff, I decided I needed some retail therapy, even if it was just in the browsing form, so, went and spent sometime at the nearest shop that sells wool. (Yes, before you try and say anything, we have already established that I have a problem!) I was very impressed with the fact that I didn't buy anything, the combined logic of (a) tight finances (b) stupid queues (c) absolutely no actual need and (d) a relatively poor selection, outweighed my rash impulses of "oooh, but there's 10% off in the sale!". I feel this shows strength and progress!
Then I came and had a lovely bonding afternoon of watching Merlin on telly with my dad whilst he ironed and I knitted. Hehe! Such quality father/daughter time! And then I headed round to the Clarks for a lovely evening of dinner, playing with the kids' toys (oh man, I do just sometimes wish I had a kid so I would have an excuse to play with toys and do random fun crafts and activities that would otherwise just be frowned upon!), reading great books - Sarah has great taste and finds fantastic books for her girls (another reason I wish I had a kid sometimes, to have the excuse to be enchanted and charmed by such beautiful books!) and playing on the Wii once the girls had gone to bed. Hehe, I suck at Mario Kart, but I have given Morgan (age 3) a brain weight of over 1400g on Brain Academy, which I think is my biggest ever score, damn, and now a three year old gets the credit... ooooooh well! Hehehe!
Wow, considering how I started this post, I did find inspiration somewhere along the way. Cool!
After all my waffling last night about what to do today, I didn't really do any of it. I didn't get up early enough to have my bath and hair wash session, I did drop my brother off, and then I decided to get pro-active about sorting my car out. Unfortunately, it's that time of year again, when the ol' MOT is due. And last year, when I had Ernie serviced they mentioned his back tyres were looking rather worn, and could do with being changed, but when I got a second opinion, they said they wouldn't bother if it were their car, so being the skint student that I am, I didn't. But I have been aware of it all year, thinking all along that once I was working and had a steady income, I would sort it. But that plan went south along with all the others that started with "when I start working properly and have proper money, I'll..." So since my MOT was due later this week (booked for Wednesday, and dreading it, been stung too much in the past to have any other emotion about it!) I decided I'd get a jump start on things and sort out the tyres in my own time rather than being told and kinda forced into it due to a failed MOT. Turns out they did need doing (shocker!) and the silly garage seemed to think they could take advantage of me (even bigger shocker!) - "we don't have any budget ones (this being a nationwide chain that advertises budget tires from £20), we've run out, the ONLY ones we have would be £56... each." To which I pulled a huge face and got up to leave, genuinely shocked, and determined I could get them cheaper elsewhere. Then he shuffles around papers on his desk and goes "no wait, I've just remembered (mmmm, yeah right!) that we had a delivery earlier (are you kidding me?!? It's a Bank holiday, I doubt you'd have recieved a delivery on a Bank holiday!) and I do have some budget ones, but they're the best quality of the budget ones, and would be £81, including the fitting and alignment" This was somewhat better, so I gave in in the end, I tried the attempt to leave again thing, but this bargaining technique had apparently being exhausted!
After all this dirty, scamming, masculating stuff, I decided I needed some retail therapy, even if it was just in the browsing form, so, went and spent sometime at the nearest shop that sells wool. (Yes, before you try and say anything, we have already established that I have a problem!) I was very impressed with the fact that I didn't buy anything, the combined logic of (a) tight finances (b) stupid queues (c) absolutely no actual need and (d) a relatively poor selection, outweighed my rash impulses of "oooh, but there's 10% off in the sale!". I feel this shows strength and progress!
Then I came and had a lovely bonding afternoon of watching Merlin on telly with my dad whilst he ironed and I knitted. Hehe! Such quality father/daughter time! And then I headed round to the Clarks for a lovely evening of dinner, playing with the kids' toys (oh man, I do just sometimes wish I had a kid so I would have an excuse to play with toys and do random fun crafts and activities that would otherwise just be frowned upon!), reading great books - Sarah has great taste and finds fantastic books for her girls (another reason I wish I had a kid sometimes, to have the excuse to be enchanted and charmed by such beautiful books!) and playing on the Wii once the girls had gone to bed. Hehe, I suck at Mario Kart, but I have given Morgan (age 3) a brain weight of over 1400g on Brain Academy, which I think is my biggest ever score, damn, and now a three year old gets the credit... ooooooh well! Hehehe!
Wow, considering how I started this post, I did find inspiration somewhere along the way. Cool!
Monday, 28 December 2009
Finally getting to eat some turkey
Yay, made it out of bed for the entire day today - I feel like progress is being made. Even if I felt like a zombie for a significant proportion of that time! And I even got round to eating properly, although as you may expect, with a bunged up nose, taste wasn't a big experience!
My family and I went round to my mom's cousin's and his family for a lovely lunch of turkey curry (it is the quini-essential British thing to do with leftovers, isn't it?). I had a serious appetite on me today after having barely eaten for two days and managed to enjoy all of the wonderful food on offer, and got to spend some lovely quality family time with everyone, something which I've also missed out on the last two days. Again, I don't think I was really a full participant of the occasion, spending most of it sniffling, blowing my nose and feeling exhausted. But I'm really glad I did it, was beginning to miss out on having company and it's always very important for my parents to be able to spend sometime with the whole family together (my older brother also lives away from Derby and makes it back even less than I do), even if it is just a token event.
I'm really starting to feel restless, I was really hoping to make the most of my time here in Derby, but with a cold, I feel kinda out of commission, as a lot of my friends have small children and even for those who don't, I don't really want to be going round infecting them, or making them paranoid that I'll be infecting them, and I don't know how much fun it would be for them to spend time with someone nursing the back end of a cold. I'm hoping that tonight will be the first really good night sleep I've had since before Christmas Eve, but this will make it even more frustrating if I'm feeling rested but still coughing and sniffling. I suppose that I could always get really stuck in with my knitting (good progress being made - now measures 17cm vs yesterday's 7cm, which may not really sound like much, but I was out most of the day!) or maybe go to the cinema as there's a couple of things on which I wouldn't mind seeing (Sherlock Holmes, Nine, Avatar) but they're both things I could do when alone in Bristol, and makes it all seem like such a waste of my valuable Derby time! And I know I definitely don't want to be hitting the chaos that is town, because I don't really have the money to be spending and whilst I'm getting better, still don't think I will have the energy to tackle the crowds, and the lack of money (going full circle here) kind of makes it pointless. Ohhh what to do, what to do... I actually don't know why I'm getting so longwinded about this all here, I really should just have a proper think about it in the morning once I've had some sleep. I'll aim for a nice lie in and then a good old bath and hair wash, drop my brother off at the train station around noon and then see how up for facing the world I really am. This sounds like the most wise plan right now! So off I go!
My family and I went round to my mom's cousin's and his family for a lovely lunch of turkey curry (it is the quini-essential British thing to do with leftovers, isn't it?). I had a serious appetite on me today after having barely eaten for two days and managed to enjoy all of the wonderful food on offer, and got to spend some lovely quality family time with everyone, something which I've also missed out on the last two days. Again, I don't think I was really a full participant of the occasion, spending most of it sniffling, blowing my nose and feeling exhausted. But I'm really glad I did it, was beginning to miss out on having company and it's always very important for my parents to be able to spend sometime with the whole family together (my older brother also lives away from Derby and makes it back even less than I do), even if it is just a token event.
I'm really starting to feel restless, I was really hoping to make the most of my time here in Derby, but with a cold, I feel kinda out of commission, as a lot of my friends have small children and even for those who don't, I don't really want to be going round infecting them, or making them paranoid that I'll be infecting them, and I don't know how much fun it would be for them to spend time with someone nursing the back end of a cold. I'm hoping that tonight will be the first really good night sleep I've had since before Christmas Eve, but this will make it even more frustrating if I'm feeling rested but still coughing and sniffling. I suppose that I could always get really stuck in with my knitting (good progress being made - now measures 17cm vs yesterday's 7cm, which may not really sound like much, but I was out most of the day!) or maybe go to the cinema as there's a couple of things on which I wouldn't mind seeing (Sherlock Holmes, Nine, Avatar) but they're both things I could do when alone in Bristol, and makes it all seem like such a waste of my valuable Derby time! And I know I definitely don't want to be hitting the chaos that is town, because I don't really have the money to be spending and whilst I'm getting better, still don't think I will have the energy to tackle the crowds, and the lack of money (going full circle here) kind of makes it pointless. Ohhh what to do, what to do... I actually don't know why I'm getting so longwinded about this all here, I really should just have a proper think about it in the morning once I've had some sleep. I'll aim for a nice lie in and then a good old bath and hair wash, drop my brother off at the train station around noon and then see how up for facing the world I really am. This sounds like the most wise plan right now! So off I go!
Saturday, 26 December 2009
Another day spent (mainly) in bed
Oh dear, this Christmas is turning out to be a bit of a write off for me! I've just spent most of another day in bed, feeling a little sorry for myself whilst the rest of my family trasped off to my grandparents for yet more festive feasting. I'm feeling much better with regards to the gastro today, and although I have eaten a bit today, I've been taking things rather carefully as my gut is still not 100%. But instead, today's ailment was a cold. Yes for those keeping score, another cold, about three weeks since the last one! I'm beginning to think that there maybe something wrong with my immune system, but having said that, most people I've been around for the last few days have had a cold, including my poor mum who is exhausted with hers, so maybe it's hardly surprising that I've come down with something. And this one seems (touch wood) much milder than the last cold I had, even coming hot on the heels of a dodgy tum, so hopefully I will be able to recover quickly, especially as tomorrow we are supposed to be going round to some more family for yet another meal. It would be nice to make at least one of the Christmas weekend family gatherings!
I did managed to get myself out of bed by midafternoon, and I was determined not to go back as I really would like a proper night's sleep, something I didn't get round to having last night, mainly I think, due to having slept so much yesterday. So, fingers crossed on that account. This time out of bed was mainly spent watching mind numbing t.v. and Wallace and Gromit - soooo cute, I love that movie, those little bunny rabbits are so ruddy adorable! I have made a slow, half-hearted attempted at my next knitting project, but I'll update more when I've got beyond the current 7 rows! And now, off to bed for a good night sleep, hopefully!
I did managed to get myself out of bed by midafternoon, and I was determined not to go back as I really would like a proper night's sleep, something I didn't get round to having last night, mainly I think, due to having slept so much yesterday. So, fingers crossed on that account. This time out of bed was mainly spent watching mind numbing t.v. and Wallace and Gromit - soooo cute, I love that movie, those little bunny rabbits are so ruddy adorable! I have made a slow, half-hearted attempted at my next knitting project, but I'll update more when I've got beyond the current 7 rows! And now, off to bed for a good night sleep, hopefully!
Mmm, spent Christmas just as I needed to, but not as I expected to!
Merry Christmas everyone. I hope that you all had lovely days with your loved ones and that you had wonderful pressies and tasty food.
I spent most of the early hours of Christmas day in the bathroom with a lovely dose of D&V, so I unfortunately spent the vast majority of Christmas day in bed asleep. I went downstairs for about half an hour for pressie exchanging, and then briefly to talk to my ouma and oupa in South Africa on Skype. And that was about it. I would have felt dreadfully unsocial if it were not for the fact that I actually slept most of the day! And also didn't really want to give everyone else gastro as a delayed Christmas present. I do feel slightly guilty that I didn't really feel enthusiastic at present time, I really did love my gifts, just didn't really feel energetic enough at the time to express that!
Now that I have given them all away, I can put up some pics of the Christmas presents that I have spent the last month working on (oh, and Emma's birthday present).
Then carrying on the sock theme, I made Rowan a set of three colour co-ordinated but non-matching socks, which hopefully should fit:
I spent most of the early hours of Christmas day in the bathroom with a lovely dose of D&V, so I unfortunately spent the vast majority of Christmas day in bed asleep. I went downstairs for about half an hour for pressie exchanging, and then briefly to talk to my ouma and oupa in South Africa on Skype. And that was about it. I would have felt dreadfully unsocial if it were not for the fact that I actually slept most of the day! And also didn't really want to give everyone else gastro as a delayed Christmas present. I do feel slightly guilty that I didn't really feel enthusiastic at present time, I really did love my gifts, just didn't really feel energetic enough at the time to express that!
Now that I have given them all away, I can put up some pics of the Christmas presents that I have spent the last month working on (oh, and Emma's birthday present).
Slippers made for Morgan (red) and Jenna (pink). They're made out of 100% wool, and Sarah has since felted them (which I was very impressed with, can't believe she found the time already!) thus they may look ginormous here, but they have shrunk alot. I will get photos of the finished items when I can.
The quwerky present I mentioned and showed a teaser of was this - a dodecohedran, a.k.a. a twelve pointed star, with each point a different colour. It was a great way to use up some of my odds and ends, and was very happily recieved by Emma on Connor's behalf, as were these socks, which should just about still fit:
Then to use up some of the wool left over from Rowan's aran cardigan, I made Sarah some wrist warmers (awww, bless, potential for co-ordinating mummy and daughter!).
And finally, Emma's scarf. This I actually crocheted for a change. It was one of my favourite wools that I've used so far. It wasn't the softest of wools, but it is 100% pure wool that has been hand spun and hand dyed in such a beautiful colour set, with plenty of green. I love that it has such a natural feel to it (in fact spent a lot of time during making it picking out little bits of twig and straw) and the fact that it is truely a unique wool, with varying thickness and colours.
Friday, 25 December 2009
Apparently, more days can be like that!
I have so many wonderful things to talk about that happened today. It was a truely special day, filled with love, friends and Christmas! I do have some photos, but I don't think I'll get round to putting too many up just yet, as it's getting late (damn that Shakespeare in Love being on so late!) and it is Christmas Day after all, so will need to be up relatively early, and be full of energy, so that amounts to tonight's post being much shorter than it could be.
I finally got paid and did my Christmas shopping today - what a nightmare, but I'm so glad it's over and done with. So I won't bother saying very much about that.
Then this afternoon, I spent some time with the Clarks and the Symes at a children's church service, complete with crafting - I ended up with lovely multi-coloured hands. It was lovely fun crafting with the girls, you can totally let your inner child out and not have people judge you! Awesome, messy, colourful, beautifully unperfect (bye-bye inner control freak!) fun!
Afterwards we all headed back to Emma's house, as it's her birthday today and Sarah made us all a lovely meal. It was a perfect evening. Children running round, all excited about various pressies, catching up, making Ems feel special, crafting (well, I was finishing off the last of my Christmas pressies), giving and recieving of lovely, thoughtful gifts. Truely a special day. Made all the more special by Connor laughing (and such a gorgeous, beautiful laugh) for the first time when I nuzzled and blew onto his tummy. Wonderfully witnessed by both his mummy and daddy he repeatedly showed off his new party trick. It was a wonderful time, and I'm so blessed to have been part of it.
And finally, one picture, because it's too cute to resist! A smiley Connor with his Mummy.
I finally got paid and did my Christmas shopping today - what a nightmare, but I'm so glad it's over and done with. So I won't bother saying very much about that.
Then this afternoon, I spent some time with the Clarks and the Symes at a children's church service, complete with crafting - I ended up with lovely multi-coloured hands. It was lovely fun crafting with the girls, you can totally let your inner child out and not have people judge you! Awesome, messy, colourful, beautifully unperfect (bye-bye inner control freak!) fun!
Afterwards we all headed back to Emma's house, as it's her birthday today and Sarah made us all a lovely meal. It was a perfect evening. Children running round, all excited about various pressies, catching up, making Ems feel special, crafting (well, I was finishing off the last of my Christmas pressies), giving and recieving of lovely, thoughtful gifts. Truely a special day. Made all the more special by Connor laughing (and such a gorgeous, beautiful laugh) for the first time when I nuzzled and blew onto his tummy. Wonderfully witnessed by both his mummy and daddy he repeatedly showed off his new party trick. It was a wonderful time, and I'm so blessed to have been part of it.
And finally, one picture, because it's too cute to resist! A smiley Connor with his Mummy.
Merry Christmas everyone!
Thursday, 24 December 2009
Aw, why can't more days be like this?
Despite my early attempts at going to bed, I had a rubbish night sleep. This consisted of dozing off about 1am and then waking up with a start following a really horrible, distressing dream at just before 3am. And then I was too wired to go back to sleep. It took ages to calm down, and it was the most upsetting dream I've had in a very long time. After a while, I completely gave up trying to get back to sleep and instead watched stuff on my laptop for a couple of hours and then eventually was able to go back to sleep.
Needless to say, this morning it was very hard indeed to wake up and get out of bed. I had set my alarm for 9am, but that came and went with repeated snoozes, until I decided that I would get up, so switched the alarm off and promptly fell fast asleep again. Until I had a lovely wake up call in the form of Sam phoning to let me know how her job interview had gone. Since she didn't fancy being alone following this, I took my mom and Sam to the chaos that was the supermarket to do the last of the grocery shopping that my family needed. We're having an extended family Christmas at our house, and as always, my mom is making sure she has enough to feed an army and then some! I was very relieved to leave the supermarket, although admittedly having the company of two people I love very dearly certainly made the experience more enjoyable.
Just after lunch we found out that Sam got the job! Yipee! I'm so very proud of her, she very much deserves it, and I know it's something she's wanted for so long now. So it was a very positive day. I eventually took Sam home and had a cup of tea and kept her company for a little longer, but the poor lass was exhausted from all the excitment, so I left her be and went and found people with more energy - little people!
I popped in to see my darling Sarah and her wonderful family, and thoroughly enjoyed every moment. It was wonderful being in a home with children at this time of year. Christmas is so exciting, and it's so easy to catch their enthusiasm. I had a lovely catch up with Sarah, and had a chance to spend a little time with each of the girls and have a cuddle. This little family means so much to me and brightens up my life so much, I am so lucky and privileged to be part of their lives, and spending time with them is a very important aspect of helping me remember about the life that still exists outstide my little medicine bubble. Thank you Sarah! :)
And just to prove what amazing friends I have, I have recieved two early Christmas pressies today. Both of which contained some beautiful wool! Hehehe! They know me so well, especially Sam's comment that she was worried that she was enabling me! I will get round to putting pics up at some point, but needless to say, I am so excited and can't wait to have a sit down and decide what to make with it. I think I may even make something for myself for a change. And as well as the wool, I got a lovely new piece of art to stick up on my wall when I get back to Bristol from the Clarks. It is so wonderful and pretty, and I'm so touched to have something original and handcrafted with so much love and time put in. Thank you all very much for my lovely presents, you have truely made me feel special and thought of.
Needless to say, this morning it was very hard indeed to wake up and get out of bed. I had set my alarm for 9am, but that came and went with repeated snoozes, until I decided that I would get up, so switched the alarm off and promptly fell fast asleep again. Until I had a lovely wake up call in the form of Sam phoning to let me know how her job interview had gone. Since she didn't fancy being alone following this, I took my mom and Sam to the chaos that was the supermarket to do the last of the grocery shopping that my family needed. We're having an extended family Christmas at our house, and as always, my mom is making sure she has enough to feed an army and then some! I was very relieved to leave the supermarket, although admittedly having the company of two people I love very dearly certainly made the experience more enjoyable.
Just after lunch we found out that Sam got the job! Yipee! I'm so very proud of her, she very much deserves it, and I know it's something she's wanted for so long now. So it was a very positive day. I eventually took Sam home and had a cup of tea and kept her company for a little longer, but the poor lass was exhausted from all the excitment, so I left her be and went and found people with more energy - little people!
I popped in to see my darling Sarah and her wonderful family, and thoroughly enjoyed every moment. It was wonderful being in a home with children at this time of year. Christmas is so exciting, and it's so easy to catch their enthusiasm. I had a lovely catch up with Sarah, and had a chance to spend a little time with each of the girls and have a cuddle. This little family means so much to me and brightens up my life so much, I am so lucky and privileged to be part of their lives, and spending time with them is a very important aspect of helping me remember about the life that still exists outstide my little medicine bubble. Thank you Sarah! :)
And just to prove what amazing friends I have, I have recieved two early Christmas pressies today. Both of which contained some beautiful wool! Hehehe! They know me so well, especially Sam's comment that she was worried that she was enabling me! I will get round to putting pics up at some point, but needless to say, I am so excited and can't wait to have a sit down and decide what to make with it. I think I may even make something for myself for a change. And as well as the wool, I got a lovely new piece of art to stick up on my wall when I get back to Bristol from the Clarks. It is so wonderful and pretty, and I'm so touched to have something original and handcrafted with so much love and time put in. Thank you all very much for my lovely presents, you have truely made me feel special and thought of.
Wednesday, 23 December 2009
Back in Derby - yipee!
Hurrah! I am back, safe and sound in Derby. It's good to be back, and to know that it's a special time to spend with loved ones, be it family or friends. I did manage to get a good solid four hours sleep this morning after my last posting. And then really struggled to get going, bed was so cosy and lets face it, four hours sleep is not a full "nights" sleep. Fortunately, I had managed to sleep on my break at work, and because it was fairly quiet, we had nice long breaks. We sneaky sneaky used some of the beds in unused parts of the ward, so it was decent sleep as opposed to lying across some raggedy looking lumpy chairs in a staff room!
I had planned to pack yesterday, but the day had somehow got away with me following all the snowy drama. I had been organised enough this morning before sleeping to jot down a packing list, as I always forget something, so was proud of that little bit of organisation as being organised is not one of my strong points! So in a flurry, I threw everything in a suitcase (packing not being one of my strong points either!) and was about to rush out the door when I remembered I hadn't done the dishes. Damn! So another delay meant all in all, I left quite a bit later than originally planned.
The roads were lovely and clear, except the icy side road I had parked Ernie in. I was really surprised that I completed the journey in two and a half hours, which was really good progress, as I did stop briefly for an espresso and some crisps, and the traffic being rather crazy at times and going all ridiculously slow! And of course what would a trip on the motorway be without idiot drivers trying to do you harm? I really wish they could hear my shouts and mutterings sometimes. Not letting me in off the slip road when the slip road is rapidly running out is not safe driving practice. Fortunately, it was a double laned slip road and I was able to pull over into the left lane when my lane ran out completely (luckily there was noone there at that precise moment), but could the idiot who didn't let me in not see what a dreadfully dangerous situation he was putting me in? But stress over, I'm here in one piece and ready for the festivities. Just had a lovely quiet evening in with my parents, catching up. And now, although I feel relatively exhausted, my body clock is still on night shift mood and feels ready to go on staying awake through the night. So I'm going to go lie in the darkness and hope sleep isn't too illusive!
I had planned to pack yesterday, but the day had somehow got away with me following all the snowy drama. I had been organised enough this morning before sleeping to jot down a packing list, as I always forget something, so was proud of that little bit of organisation as being organised is not one of my strong points! So in a flurry, I threw everything in a suitcase (packing not being one of my strong points either!) and was about to rush out the door when I remembered I hadn't done the dishes. Damn! So another delay meant all in all, I left quite a bit later than originally planned.
The roads were lovely and clear, except the icy side road I had parked Ernie in. I was really surprised that I completed the journey in two and a half hours, which was really good progress, as I did stop briefly for an espresso and some crisps, and the traffic being rather crazy at times and going all ridiculously slow! And of course what would a trip on the motorway be without idiot drivers trying to do you harm? I really wish they could hear my shouts and mutterings sometimes. Not letting me in off the slip road when the slip road is rapidly running out is not safe driving practice. Fortunately, it was a double laned slip road and I was able to pull over into the left lane when my lane ran out completely (luckily there was noone there at that precise moment), but could the idiot who didn't let me in not see what a dreadfully dangerous situation he was putting me in? But stress over, I'm here in one piece and ready for the festivities. Just had a lovely quiet evening in with my parents, catching up. And now, although I feel relatively exhausted, my body clock is still on night shift mood and feels ready to go on staying awake through the night. So I'm going to go lie in the darkness and hope sleep isn't too illusive!
Tuesday, 22 December 2009
The kindness of strangers
Sometimes I'm just peeved at all the rubbish that life throws at me, and have to fight very hard to not do the whole "why me?" thing. Other times, I'm just continuously touched by the kindness and good will of others. Maybe life really does just balance out... eventually! Or maybe there is such a thing as karma. Or maybe it's just really dependent on my mood how I end up seeing things, some days concentrating more on the positive, and other days, more on the negative. Or maybe, just maybe, it's just human nature to see patterns and trends when they don't really exist.
Last night, I duely caught the bus and left the car safely parked, and avoiding ice skating it down Gloucester Road. And if I'm making confessions, I think that I've thought of a New Year's resolution - SEEK HELP FOR KNITTING ADDICTION! Joys of public transport and waiting for it to arrive, meant that I had a few minutes waiting around, so I unashamedly got the needles out, stood at the bus stop and did some rows, even getting on the bus in the middle of a row and without dropping a stitch. I did some knitting on the bus, but it was bordering on sensory overload and it made me feel a little queasy, so I didn't push it too much!
I left later than planned, but it ended being spot on, I was there on time, even after changing into my uniform out of my layers and layers. I was working on one of my favourite wards, and it was a night like last night that reminded me why I like that ward, and dare I say it, sometimes even enjoy work. I had good company, the patients were all really nice and friendly, and I managed to have time to have some lovely chats with some of them. And all in all, nice, smooth shift. Whilst we were waiting for handover last night, we got to talking about the horrendous weather conditions, and I mentioned that I had played it safe and bused it in. And one of the nurses immediately offered me a lift home for the morning. She lives in vaguely the same area as me, although I probably doubled her journey time. I was so amazed. Hot off the heels of the lovely shopkeeper and his advice and offers of tea, another kind deed was offered me. I don't think I've ever been offered a lift home, and I was very grateful, as it meant I was home nice and early after the shift, and now, I'm tucked up in bed, eyes beginning to feel heavy, and able to have a nice early bedtime. I'm hoping this will mean I'm more up for driving back to Derby later after a nice long snooze. Although I still have to pack properly, I'm hoping, weather permitting to hit the road by mid-afternoon...
Last night, I duely caught the bus and left the car safely parked, and avoiding ice skating it down Gloucester Road. And if I'm making confessions, I think that I've thought of a New Year's resolution - SEEK HELP FOR KNITTING ADDICTION! Joys of public transport and waiting for it to arrive, meant that I had a few minutes waiting around, so I unashamedly got the needles out, stood at the bus stop and did some rows, even getting on the bus in the middle of a row and without dropping a stitch. I did some knitting on the bus, but it was bordering on sensory overload and it made me feel a little queasy, so I didn't push it too much!
I left later than planned, but it ended being spot on, I was there on time, even after changing into my uniform out of my layers and layers. I was working on one of my favourite wards, and it was a night like last night that reminded me why I like that ward, and dare I say it, sometimes even enjoy work. I had good company, the patients were all really nice and friendly, and I managed to have time to have some lovely chats with some of them. And all in all, nice, smooth shift. Whilst we were waiting for handover last night, we got to talking about the horrendous weather conditions, and I mentioned that I had played it safe and bused it in. And one of the nurses immediately offered me a lift home for the morning. She lives in vaguely the same area as me, although I probably doubled her journey time. I was so amazed. Hot off the heels of the lovely shopkeeper and his advice and offers of tea, another kind deed was offered me. I don't think I've ever been offered a lift home, and I was very grateful, as it meant I was home nice and early after the shift, and now, I'm tucked up in bed, eyes beginning to feel heavy, and able to have a nice early bedtime. I'm hoping this will mean I'm more up for driving back to Derby later after a nice long snooze. Although I still have to pack properly, I'm hoping, weather permitting to hit the road by mid-afternoon...
Monday, 21 December 2009
Snowed in at work! Arggggggggggggggggh!
I have broke tradition. Well, the "longstanding" tradition that was blogging every day. But there is a fairly valid reason for this, I had to prioritise sleep, after a very hectic "day".
I should have known that it was gonna be "one of those days" from the start. Having being messed around with my shift on Saturday night, I decided my first action of Sunday would be to confirm my shifts. So I did, and my shifts for the rest of the weekend were the same. So, with relief, I got myself ready for work, and headed out to work in my car (this will be relevant later, in case you were wondering why I'm giving such a blow by blow account!).
I got to the ward and introduced myself, to which the nurse pulled a face, and then carried on doing whatever she was doing. Because of all the hassles I get, being moved, I always introduce myself and confirm they're expecting me. After a couple of minutes (during which time, I'm thinking to myself, "oh no, I'm missing handover, maybe I should go find it") she finally gets to me, saying that she doesn't think I should be there. I got rather annoyed by this statement, so I point out to her that I confirmed it just a few hours before hand. Then she gets distracted again, and ignores me for another couple of minutes. I mean come on, if I'm not supposed to be working there, then I should be finding out where I was supposed to be, to minimise the lateness to that ward, or horror of annoying horrors, heading home if they couldn't find anywhere for me. Then perhaps sensing my growing annoyance and frustration, she grabs me and takes me to their handover room. Noone there is any the wiser, but all there seem to think that they aren't expecting another HCA. So now bordering on anger and getting ready to fight with someone over this mess, I phone the bank office (people who allocate shifts and work as a liason between the wards and the temporary staff like me). I confirm with them that I'm where I'm supposed to be, and they ask to speak to someone from the ward, to which they all refuse to do so. So the bank office say that they'll phone the ward directly (I was phoning them on my mobile). So after a few more minutes, I get the confirmation that I'm supposed to be there, and I can stay, even though this effectively makes the ward overstaffed - how I do wish people would communicate with each other, as it's always us bank staff that get the recieving end of the fallout.
So, I settle down, after the nurse giving me a piece of her mind with some crappy curt comment about how it's not all about me, that we're there to look after the patients, and it's all about patient safety and if this means I'm inconvienenced, well tough. Hello! She totally missed the point of why I was so annoyed, and in my defence, if I'm not meant to be there, somewhere else, there are other patients who are not getting my care and their safety is being compromised! Annnoying **** of a woman! So I had handover.
Then on the last few patients in the handover, one of the other nurses comes in and says "Is there an Ashleigh here? You have been moved to ward (let's anonomise it) X. Sorry". I hate ward X, and usually avoid it like the ruddy plague. Just perfect!
Ward X is a cohort ward (people who know the BRI now know where I was! So much for keeping it anonomous!) which means they grab everyone with infective diarrhea and put them together. Ok, so it is more civilised than I just described, but it does automatically make one think they have a night of buttom cleaning and bed making ahead of them. And when I arrived I found out that I was there to one-on-one babysit a patient who was very confused, aggitated and unsteady. Poor chap looked like he was on the loosing end of a heavyweight boxing match, so covered in bruises and cuts and scraps from his many falls. In the end it wasn't too bad. He slept most of the night, becoming a bit restless every now and then, and there was only one occasion when I thought we were about to come acropper (we didn't, phew!). So I sat on an uncomfortable chair at the open door of his cubicle most of the night, knitting away whilst he serenaded me with this snores!
The other downside to this ward is the fact fact that I was working with two very loud nurses. Nothing against them, they were nice and friendly, but shouted their way through drool topic after drool topic for most of the night. I really wanted to tell them to shhhhhh! as it was a night shift, people are trying to sleep, and my poor chap didn't need a series of excited exclamations continously rousing him from his peaceful and much needed slumber. But who am I to tell off nurses, when I'm just a temp HCA? So I kept this to myself, until one of them went to the loo, then came back shouting extra loud into the momentary silence that accompanied the two of them being split up that it had started snowing. To which I went "ssshhhhhhhhhhhh! You'll wake everyone up!" Response? Nonchalant shrug!
Mmmm, snow.... it was around midnight, and it was night a snug inside, so I added snowfalling watching to my routine of "glance at knitting, glance at patient, listen out to patient's snores, glance at knitting and pick up stitch droped whilst looking at patient". For two hours! I couldn't really see much of outstide, but on the roofs and carpark area that I could see, the snow had settled a little, but over the course of the morning the snow piles seemed to shrink, so I assumed that this meant it was melting, and that the drive home would be ok. How wrong could I get! This is what I found when I eventually got to Ernie (my car), all frosty, hungry and tired:
There's my Ernie, the blue car, looking extra blue under his snow blanket and a very icy road.
P.S. this has been an epic post, sorry, and well done if you managed it all. And I normally proof read before I post, but couldn't be bothered tonight. So forgive typos, non-sense and bad grammer!
I should have known that it was gonna be "one of those days" from the start. Having being messed around with my shift on Saturday night, I decided my first action of Sunday would be to confirm my shifts. So I did, and my shifts for the rest of the weekend were the same. So, with relief, I got myself ready for work, and headed out to work in my car (this will be relevant later, in case you were wondering why I'm giving such a blow by blow account!).
I got to the ward and introduced myself, to which the nurse pulled a face, and then carried on doing whatever she was doing. Because of all the hassles I get, being moved, I always introduce myself and confirm they're expecting me. After a couple of minutes (during which time, I'm thinking to myself, "oh no, I'm missing handover, maybe I should go find it") she finally gets to me, saying that she doesn't think I should be there. I got rather annoyed by this statement, so I point out to her that I confirmed it just a few hours before hand. Then she gets distracted again, and ignores me for another couple of minutes. I mean come on, if I'm not supposed to be working there, then I should be finding out where I was supposed to be, to minimise the lateness to that ward, or horror of annoying horrors, heading home if they couldn't find anywhere for me. Then perhaps sensing my growing annoyance and frustration, she grabs me and takes me to their handover room. Noone there is any the wiser, but all there seem to think that they aren't expecting another HCA. So now bordering on anger and getting ready to fight with someone over this mess, I phone the bank office (people who allocate shifts and work as a liason between the wards and the temporary staff like me). I confirm with them that I'm where I'm supposed to be, and they ask to speak to someone from the ward, to which they all refuse to do so. So the bank office say that they'll phone the ward directly (I was phoning them on my mobile). So after a few more minutes, I get the confirmation that I'm supposed to be there, and I can stay, even though this effectively makes the ward overstaffed - how I do wish people would communicate with each other, as it's always us bank staff that get the recieving end of the fallout.
So, I settle down, after the nurse giving me a piece of her mind with some crappy curt comment about how it's not all about me, that we're there to look after the patients, and it's all about patient safety and if this means I'm inconvienenced, well tough. Hello! She totally missed the point of why I was so annoyed, and in my defence, if I'm not meant to be there, somewhere else, there are other patients who are not getting my care and their safety is being compromised! Annnoying **** of a woman! So I had handover.
Then on the last few patients in the handover, one of the other nurses comes in and says "Is there an Ashleigh here? You have been moved to ward (let's anonomise it) X. Sorry". I hate ward X, and usually avoid it like the ruddy plague. Just perfect!
Ward X is a cohort ward (people who know the BRI now know where I was! So much for keeping it anonomous!) which means they grab everyone with infective diarrhea and put them together. Ok, so it is more civilised than I just described, but it does automatically make one think they have a night of buttom cleaning and bed making ahead of them. And when I arrived I found out that I was there to one-on-one babysit a patient who was very confused, aggitated and unsteady. Poor chap looked like he was on the loosing end of a heavyweight boxing match, so covered in bruises and cuts and scraps from his many falls. In the end it wasn't too bad. He slept most of the night, becoming a bit restless every now and then, and there was only one occasion when I thought we were about to come acropper (we didn't, phew!). So I sat on an uncomfortable chair at the open door of his cubicle most of the night, knitting away whilst he serenaded me with this snores!
The other downside to this ward is the fact fact that I was working with two very loud nurses. Nothing against them, they were nice and friendly, but shouted their way through drool topic after drool topic for most of the night. I really wanted to tell them to shhhhhh! as it was a night shift, people are trying to sleep, and my poor chap didn't need a series of excited exclamations continously rousing him from his peaceful and much needed slumber. But who am I to tell off nurses, when I'm just a temp HCA? So I kept this to myself, until one of them went to the loo, then came back shouting extra loud into the momentary silence that accompanied the two of them being split up that it had started snowing. To which I went "ssshhhhhhhhhhhh! You'll wake everyone up!" Response? Nonchalant shrug!
Mmmm, snow.... it was around midnight, and it was night a snug inside, so I added snowfalling watching to my routine of "glance at knitting, glance at patient, listen out to patient's snores, glance at knitting and pick up stitch droped whilst looking at patient". For two hours! I couldn't really see much of outstide, but on the roofs and carpark area that I could see, the snow had settled a little, but over the course of the morning the snow piles seemed to shrink, so I assumed that this meant it was melting, and that the drive home would be ok. How wrong could I get! This is what I found when I eventually got to Ernie (my car), all frosty, hungry and tired:
There's my Ernie, the blue car, looking extra blue under his snow blanket and a very icy road. 
And after several minutes hard, cold work, with no gloves, I got to this:
Wipers still frozen solid to the windscreen, far side doors iced shut and all my deicer used up.
At this point, I have to talk about how the kindness of strangers has affected my life. When I first got to the car, I was horrified by the extent of iced snow on it. And I remembered seeing my ice scraper when I was packing at the end of last year, so I didn't think it was in the car, so I nipped into the newsagent next to where I had parked, just on the off chance that they sold them, but he didn't. He spent ages looking around for his, incase he had one in the shop, then he kept an eye on me as I attempted to use an empty 2L plastic bottle (fairly effective in a push!) and then I eventually got fed up and search my car, turned out, Ernie was hiding my scraper under one of the chairs. Then once I got it all cleared, I took one look at the road and the few cars attempting it. I wasn't feeling too confident about driving, but oh, so hungry and tired and cold. The chap came out of his shop and started to give me advice about driving in such icy conditions. Then I told him that I was toying with the idea of leaving the car and getting a bus. I then asked if he knew what the rest of the day was forcasted to be like. He didn't know, but he took me back inside the shop and we looked through teletext (surprisingly unhelpful!). Still torn, but with my need for food and sleep getting greater, I was resigned to leave it. Then the sweetest thing - he offered to make me a cup of tea or coffee. He was so sweet and gentle about it. I was so touched and by that point in the day, I almost felt like crying. Thank you kind kind man. But I felt bad from distracting him from his shop, so I declined.
I eventually decided to trapse back to work, and get some breakfast and wait a little while to see if conditions improved, and toyed with the idea of nicking a blanket and crashing on one of the sofas in the common room. I didn't in the end, I wanted my bed! So I climbed the crazy Cardiac Hill for the second time, back to the car, in the hope that it would be better to drive. It was, slightly. So very carefully, taking heed of what my new friend had told me about driving in snow, I eased Ernie out and started on my way home.
Wow, I've never driven in such conditions, and even though I was on roads I've driven down a thousand times before, the feel of it and the strange commeradery of the other drivers made it feel like an exciting (if not very much on edge!) adventure. Listening to the radio, I found out that the street I live on, one of the busiest in Bristol, hadn't been gritted (! ooops Bristol City Council!) for a large section, so I carefully planned a new route home to miss this, and thinking about which roads were considered "main enough" to have been gritted and driven a lot. And off I went. Much of the journey in first gear, and never more than second, and never going faster than 15mph, I crawled home, via the petrol station (something I had always planned to do, and was getting paranoid, although the light hadn't come on, I was running low, and had been idling the car for ages) and got more deicer. Then hit awful traffic. So a journey which yesterday took less than five minutes, today took nearly an hour! And no, buses wouldn't have been faster, as they would have got stuck in traffic.
In the end, I got to bed just after 11, having been awake since 3:30 yesterday afternoon. I'm normally in bed by 9 after a night shift.
And here I am, sleep deprived but safe and sound. And I'm definitely getting the bus tonight! Even though it's less than ideal, it will be best. I'm just starting to get worried now about getting back to Derby. Was aiming for tomorrow, and was thinking it would be tiredness dependent. Now it's going to be weather dependent. I've just heard they've issued a severe weather warning for Bristol for tonight with more heavy snow expected. But I'll worry about it when I need to. I just need to stick with being safe for now.
Finally, despite the dramas that was this day, there was calm and beauty everywhere, especially at 7:30 in the morning. Only had my phone, but still some lovely snaps.
The last one was the local Christmas tree sale lot. This close to Christmas, it's somewhat depleted, but the snow on the trees made it seem wonderfully seasonal!
Sunday, 20 December 2009
Yawn, it's 8am and I'm ready for bed
Doing night shifts are great in many ways. Better money is probably the biggest bonus. I know this makes me sound like it's all about the money, but lets face it, at the end of the day, I wouldn't be working my parttime job if I didn't need the money! The shifts are longer (10hours vs 5hr45mins) and then there's the antisocial hours pay. So all in all, it works out better. I'm not a morning person, in fact, quite the opposite, I'm an absolute night owl, and I'm often up till 2, so going through the night isn't so much of a stretch! Also on the whole, night shifts tend to run a bit smoother. After the rubbish shifts I've had recently, last night was a dream! In a shocking turn of events we were overstaffed! There we three HCAs and four trained nurses and just 24 patients. And considering I was on a surgical ward (where patients are less ill and more independent) and it was night (so people are mostly sleeping) it worked out to be a very quiet shift. We were very organised and finished all the evening jobs by 11 (it's often midnight or slightly later!) and so, what else is a girl to do but get the knitting out. In a way, I feel slightly guilty about spending so much of the time knitting. But there was honestly nothing else to do. So, knitting away the hours was great! Got loads done.
And the last good thing about nights is the calm of coming home at 7:30 in the morning. Especially on a crisp winter Sunday morning. So quiet and serene. And this morning, the sun was just about rising, with a beautiful orangy pink glow just appearing on the horizon. Just lovely!
And now I'm home. I'm exhausted and somewhat hungry. But I'm torn, don't think I can be bothered to eat, let alone prepare something to eat. Oh dear. I know that if I don't eat now, I'll be waking up starved, and probably not sleep as well as if my stomach weren't grumbling! Oh dear, you know I'm scraping the barrel when I'm writting such rubbish about such rubbish! So I'll stop. Nighty-night!
And the last good thing about nights is the calm of coming home at 7:30 in the morning. Especially on a crisp winter Sunday morning. So quiet and serene. And this morning, the sun was just about rising, with a beautiful orangy pink glow just appearing on the horizon. Just lovely!
And now I'm home. I'm exhausted and somewhat hungry. But I'm torn, don't think I can be bothered to eat, let alone prepare something to eat. Oh dear. I know that if I don't eat now, I'll be waking up starved, and probably not sleep as well as if my stomach weren't grumbling! Oh dear, you know I'm scraping the barrel when I'm writting such rubbish about such rubbish! So I'll stop. Nighty-night!
Friday, 18 December 2009
End of term!
Brrrr! It is even more freezing than before! I can't believe how cold it is, it's barely crept above 1.5 degrees today here in Bristol. But on a positive note, it was gloriously sunny for most of the day, so it's the kind of cold that I don't really mind, it's worse when it's cold and wet, you just never can get comfortable with that kind of weather. I'm in a way kind of disappointed that it hasn't snowed here - I love snow, it's pretty and it's different, and it also probably has something to do with the fact that it's still fairly novel for me, having grown up without the opportunity to see snow. But the fact that it is such a disruption to life means I'm less disappointed - I have such a busy weekend coming up - three night shifts at work and a little running around to do, so the ability to get places without freezing or it being dangerous is a bonus!
Today marked a landmark of the year for me - the end of the first term. It's a great place to sit back and reflect on what I have achieved thus far. And what I have left to achieve in the rest of the year. Have I made the most of the term? This is a very difficult question to ask myself, mainly because if I'm being honest, deep down, I don't think I have. Well, relative to last year at least. I don't think I've been more proactive than I was for the first term of last year. I may have learnt a couple of things along the way, but in terms of getting things done, well, honestly, no. I'm comparing it to last year, and viewing this as a negative because last year ultimately wasn't a success, so perhaps I should be striving for more? What has been hard was loosing the best part of two weeks feeling rundown/tired, and then having that cold. When the term is only 8 weeks long, having two weeks written off is a significant thing. Maybe I'm being a little hard on myself, because chatting to some of my coursemates, I don't think I've done much less than them, and I also have the advantage of having done it all already. But, I shouldn't lull myself into a false sense of security and I really can't afford to be complacent. I really do need to start pushing myself more. I need to pass, I need to really get on with things next term. I've been fairly pre-active about parts of it, and I'll try to be organised and keep the end goal in sight more, something which I really haven't done yet.
I think that I am in a better place personally this year, compared to last. When I started last year, I was under a lot of stress, and I didn't really achieve much, and felt quite down a lot of the time. Despite what has happened, I feel I'm more collected and more content. I've connected more with some of my friends, and I have their support. I may live alone, but that doesn't bother me. I think in a way it has been good for me. I have time to myself, time to think and to relax, without having to worry about how my actions affect my housemates. If I want to slob out on the sofa, that's fine. If I make a mess, noone cares but me. I mean, I've loved living with other people, and that certainly does have its advantages. People are usually shocked when they find out I live alone, and think I must be lonely. But I'm not. Not as much as you'd think. And for me, at this point in my life, it may be best. Fewer distractions! And it also motivates. I make more of an effort to see and communicate with my friends, and that has been great. I also have been crafting and doing things far more than I have in years. It's a great way of keeping me busy, and I really don't sit around thinking about loneliness or wallowing. It isn't bad at all.
So, with one term down, and one and a bit left, I really have a lot to reflect on, and it's not too bad! Definitely room for improvement on the uni front in terms of being productive, but on the whole, it's been a good term. Just look at all the things I've achieved with my knitting!
Today marked a landmark of the year for me - the end of the first term. It's a great place to sit back and reflect on what I have achieved thus far. And what I have left to achieve in the rest of the year. Have I made the most of the term? This is a very difficult question to ask myself, mainly because if I'm being honest, deep down, I don't think I have. Well, relative to last year at least. I don't think I've been more proactive than I was for the first term of last year. I may have learnt a couple of things along the way, but in terms of getting things done, well, honestly, no. I'm comparing it to last year, and viewing this as a negative because last year ultimately wasn't a success, so perhaps I should be striving for more? What has been hard was loosing the best part of two weeks feeling rundown/tired, and then having that cold. When the term is only 8 weeks long, having two weeks written off is a significant thing. Maybe I'm being a little hard on myself, because chatting to some of my coursemates, I don't think I've done much less than them, and I also have the advantage of having done it all already. But, I shouldn't lull myself into a false sense of security and I really can't afford to be complacent. I really do need to start pushing myself more. I need to pass, I need to really get on with things next term. I've been fairly pre-active about parts of it, and I'll try to be organised and keep the end goal in sight more, something which I really haven't done yet.
I think that I am in a better place personally this year, compared to last. When I started last year, I was under a lot of stress, and I didn't really achieve much, and felt quite down a lot of the time. Despite what has happened, I feel I'm more collected and more content. I've connected more with some of my friends, and I have their support. I may live alone, but that doesn't bother me. I think in a way it has been good for me. I have time to myself, time to think and to relax, without having to worry about how my actions affect my housemates. If I want to slob out on the sofa, that's fine. If I make a mess, noone cares but me. I mean, I've loved living with other people, and that certainly does have its advantages. People are usually shocked when they find out I live alone, and think I must be lonely. But I'm not. Not as much as you'd think. And for me, at this point in my life, it may be best. Fewer distractions! And it also motivates. I make more of an effort to see and communicate with my friends, and that has been great. I also have been crafting and doing things far more than I have in years. It's a great way of keeping me busy, and I really don't sit around thinking about loneliness or wallowing. It isn't bad at all.
So, with one term down, and one and a bit left, I really have a lot to reflect on, and it's not too bad! Definitely room for improvement on the uni front in terms of being productive, but on the whole, it's been a good term. Just look at all the things I've achieved with my knitting!
Thursday, 17 December 2009
Jupiter and Haloumi Salad
Had quite a busy day, and it was lovely! I spent the afternoon making Christmas cards, as a way of using up some of the leftover crafting stuff from the Christmas decorations. It was wonderous fun and I was really pleased with the results, especially as I didn't really have any ideas or inspiration. Lovely little organic, see where the mood takes you kinda thing. I can't really show all of the cards, because they haven't reached their destinations yet, but I have given a few to my Bristol friends:
For Harry (and Claire) who loves red and black
For Mary and Paddy
And speaking of my Bristol friends, we went out for dinner tonight. In the past, we've usually done a Christmas meal at someones house, but it's a lot of effort, and none of us really have a big enough place anymore. So we went out for a lovely meal instead, tonight being the last night before Christmas that we could all make it. It was really nice, and everyone was in high spirits. My eyes were somewhat bigger than my stomach though, and I came home with half a mushroom-free jupiter pizza, which will make for great lunch tomorrow. I still can't believe that Christmas is getting so close now. It's strange, I've been preparing Christmasy stuff for ages now, but now it's a week away! Crazy! When did that happen? The only downer on the night was the sub-freezing temperatures. So cold, crazy! When did that happen?
Mary and I wanted to get a picture together, but out of six attempts, none where great, so I put the worst, most qwerky one here. 
For Mary and Paddy
And speaking of my Bristol friends, we went out for dinner tonight. In the past, we've usually done a Christmas meal at someones house, but it's a lot of effort, and none of us really have a big enough place anymore. So we went out for a lovely meal instead, tonight being the last night before Christmas that we could all make it. It was really nice, and everyone was in high spirits. My eyes were somewhat bigger than my stomach though, and I came home with half a mushroom-free jupiter pizza, which will make for great lunch tomorrow. I still can't believe that Christmas is getting so close now. It's strange, I've been preparing Christmasy stuff for ages now, but now it's a week away! Crazy! When did that happen? The only downer on the night was the sub-freezing temperatures. So cold, crazy! When did that happen?
Mary and I wanted to get a picture together, but out of six attempts, none where great, so I put the worst, most qwerky one here. 
Wednesday, 16 December 2009
Highlights of a boring day
It was another one of those days where nothing special happened. So I have decided that I should reflect on the day and try to find the good things about the day.
- Waking up in a nice warm cosy bed - definitely a blessing, and one of those things that we take for granted, but we are lucky for.
- Tea - had lovely tea today. Nothing special, just my normal tea, but it was very good. And I do love my tea! Back to having dairy milk, and I think this is the first time that I've really enjoyed my tea in ages. Yes, I do realise that it is rather sad that I get so much excitment and joy out of something so small and everyday!
- Good health. Being round hospitals all my life, I sometimes tend to become a little indifferent to being surrounded by ill people. But good health is also something that we tend to take for granted until we no longer have it. And since I practically live in hospitals (I've been in a hospital of some sort every day for the last 10 days) this is something that I should be more aware of and conscious of. And I really shouldn't moan so much when I get a cold!
- Knowledge and curiosity - again, a huge part of my life. It probably the one of the things I treasure most about my chosen career. It's all so darn interesting and fastinating. I love learning and being challenged, yet I also love the fact that no matter how much I do learn, I still crave more and have so many questions. I think curiosity is one of the greatest human traits, regardless of age, and is something that should always be nutured.
- Homemade leek and potato soup. I'm so proud of my soup, I think it was the best leek and potato I've made. I kinda wish now I paid more attention to what I was doing, I can't really pinpoint what I did to make it so tasty! Probably just a fluke, but how lucky!
- My knitting. This list wouldn't be complete without my knitting. I'm loving the project that I'm working on at the moment. It's so different and querky. I still can't believe how much I'm enjoying my knitting. I'm still expecting to get bored of it, and pack it all away! But I'm getting so much fulfillment out of it. It makes my day to come home and enjoy my knitting and see the end products. So wonderfully rewarding.
So, yes, even in a day when nothing in particular happens, there's still plenty to be grateful for and to find joy and reward in. And now if ends as it began, with my bed, all warm and cosy!
- Waking up in a nice warm cosy bed - definitely a blessing, and one of those things that we take for granted, but we are lucky for.
- Tea - had lovely tea today. Nothing special, just my normal tea, but it was very good. And I do love my tea! Back to having dairy milk, and I think this is the first time that I've really enjoyed my tea in ages. Yes, I do realise that it is rather sad that I get so much excitment and joy out of something so small and everyday!
- Good health. Being round hospitals all my life, I sometimes tend to become a little indifferent to being surrounded by ill people. But good health is also something that we tend to take for granted until we no longer have it. And since I practically live in hospitals (I've been in a hospital of some sort every day for the last 10 days) this is something that I should be more aware of and conscious of. And I really shouldn't moan so much when I get a cold!
- Knowledge and curiosity - again, a huge part of my life. It probably the one of the things I treasure most about my chosen career. It's all so darn interesting and fastinating. I love learning and being challenged, yet I also love the fact that no matter how much I do learn, I still crave more and have so many questions. I think curiosity is one of the greatest human traits, regardless of age, and is something that should always be nutured.
- Homemade leek and potato soup. I'm so proud of my soup, I think it was the best leek and potato I've made. I kinda wish now I paid more attention to what I was doing, I can't really pinpoint what I did to make it so tasty! Probably just a fluke, but how lucky!
- My knitting. This list wouldn't be complete without my knitting. I'm loving the project that I'm working on at the moment. It's so different and querky. I still can't believe how much I'm enjoying my knitting. I'm still expecting to get bored of it, and pack it all away! But I'm getting so much fulfillment out of it. It makes my day to come home and enjoy my knitting and see the end products. So wonderfully rewarding.
So, yes, even in a day when nothing in particular happens, there's still plenty to be grateful for and to find joy and reward in. And now if ends as it began, with my bed, all warm and cosy!
Tuesday, 15 December 2009
A day of nothing to say!
Exploding potatoes!
Something very bizarre happened to me and my kitchen earlier. I had a jacket potato for dinner. I don't have a microwave, so they take ages in the oven, but always so worth it! So I got my potato ready and poked it with a fork a few times and shoved it in the oven. Then, when it looked done, I got a fork to pick it up out of the oven and pop it on my plate, and well, pop was the operative word here! It exploded on me, creating quite a mess! I couldn't believe it, I've never seen anything quite like it before. It was a little disappointing as when I eventually got round to eating it, there actually wasn't much potato left in the skin. Darn! It looked a little like this, just in case you think I was exaggerating!
I got the extra wool today, and the present is finished. So excited about it, I'm so loving that wool, and I can't wait to share it! My next project (again a likely Christmas pressie if I get it done in time) is back to knitting and is a good way of using up some scraps, and I'll give you a little teaser as to what's to come!
I got the extra wool today, and the present is finished. So excited about it, I'm so loving that wool, and I can't wait to share it! My next project (again a likely Christmas pressie if I get it done in time) is back to knitting and is a good way of using up some scraps, and I'll give you a little teaser as to what's to come!
Sunday, 13 December 2009
Sunday woes
What a mixed day! It was a lovely start, with Harry and Claire having us all round for pancakes - they did a great job, masses of pancakes, sausages, bacon, maple syrup and tea. What more could you ask for on a lazy Sunday morning? Good company, good food, Sunday papers. Lovely.
Then it was a mad dash to get home and get ready for work. And man, what a shift. I was looking after nine patients, all elderly women, and I think all but one of them was listed as confused or as suffering from dementia. I spent about 45mins trying to feed one her dinner before it got cold (failed on that account) and without her wearing it (failed there too). And had to clean several of them who decided it was fun to paint themselves and their surroundings with less than desirable "paints". Not fun, in the slightest, especially when they get aggresive, both verbally and physically. It was quite stressful and fairly exhausting! But there were some quiet moments and I got a chance to do a bit of crocheting, whilst sitting listening to the one non-confused patient chatter away - I think she was glad for some sane company!
I've now used up all of the wool I brought on Thursday, and it was definitely not enough, so I have to get round to getting some more at some point this week. I'm doing neurology this week at one of the other Bristol hospitals, so I'll be a little nearer the place I got the wool from, so it'll be less out the way for me. Still a little annoyed about it, but still no matter, I love the wool and I'm really enjoying the thing I'm making with it!
And now the weekend is all over and done with. And now it's back to uni, but at least I'm not more or less back to normal functioning, so hopefully I can really make the most of it. Have a good one everyone!
Then it was a mad dash to get home and get ready for work. And man, what a shift. I was looking after nine patients, all elderly women, and I think all but one of them was listed as confused or as suffering from dementia. I spent about 45mins trying to feed one her dinner before it got cold (failed on that account) and without her wearing it (failed there too). And had to clean several of them who decided it was fun to paint themselves and their surroundings with less than desirable "paints". Not fun, in the slightest, especially when they get aggresive, both verbally and physically. It was quite stressful and fairly exhausting! But there were some quiet moments and I got a chance to do a bit of crocheting, whilst sitting listening to the one non-confused patient chatter away - I think she was glad for some sane company!
I've now used up all of the wool I brought on Thursday, and it was definitely not enough, so I have to get round to getting some more at some point this week. I'm doing neurology this week at one of the other Bristol hospitals, so I'll be a little nearer the place I got the wool from, so it'll be less out the way for me. Still a little annoyed about it, but still no matter, I love the wool and I'm really enjoying the thing I'm making with it!
And now the weekend is all over and done with. And now it's back to uni, but at least I'm not more or less back to normal functioning, so hopefully I can really make the most of it. Have a good one everyone!
Mulled wine and friends
Just a quickie, because I'm really tired, and have a pounding headache. And I've already posted today, so it's not as if I'm breaking my run of daily posts. Here are my lovely Bristol friends, managing to get together and have a great night of chatting and catching up. I love all these people so dearly! They make me laugh, and feel carefree. They understand about my life as a medic and the allure of uni, and being young professionals. They give me such wonderful support and are just fantastic friends. I'm a truely lucky girl to have such amazing and varied friends, from those shown below to all the others that touch my life in one way or the other.
Sarah and Sam to the left, Mary (middle) and Claire
(Right to Left) Rachel, Liam, Jess and Rob
Harry, looking wonderfully happy with life - his usual photo pose
Sarah and Sam to the left, Mary (middle) and Claire 
(Right to Left) Rachel, Liam, Jess and Rob
Harry, looking wonderfully happy with life - his usual photo pose
Saturday, 12 December 2009
This is what happens when you watch too much CSI
I had an actual wake-from-sleep nightmare(ish) last night! It was so surreal, and definitely points out that I've been watching too much CSI! So here it is:
I was in some sort of lab, with a couple of the CSI (Vegas) crew, and we were conducting an experiment of sorts, you know, like they do. Our experiment was awful, and certainly not something I'd condone, and it's also where this all gets a little surreal. We had this monkey on the countertop, it wasn't like any actual monkey I've ever seen, it was highly stylised - very, very thin and drawn out. We were forcing it to consume various toxins, to see which ones induced vomiting (told you it was awful). It was vomiting up very politely into a little funnel. And then in between different trials, it started talking to me. It was very articulate and clearly highly educated. Then the lab tech and the CSIs left me, having just given a last dose to the monkey. As they were leaving, they told me that I should ensure that the monkey was secure, which was when I noticed that there was a system to chain a leashlike device between the monkey and the counter. They also joked that I should be careful in case the things we were giving the monkey made it turn on us. So I turned to the monkey to see if I could secure it, wondering how I was going to work it. But the monkey, busy chatting to me, obligingly did it for me... which I remember thinking was very strange, and kind of defeating the point of securing it, if it was able to work the mechanism itself. He was also going on about what the CSIs had said about him turning on me, almost as if he was offended by the way they had talked about him. Then as I was tidying up, he started joking about going crazy, and mocking me about how I would react. Then I was getting rid of a syringe in a little side room, I chucked it from the door, but missed the container. At that point, the monkey freed himself from the leash and started having some sort of fit and making general demonic sounds. I told him to stop being silly and that it wasn't funny, and I went into the room, not thinking much of the monkey's cruel joke. As I was bending down to pick up the syringe to place it properly in it's disposal container, all this this cluttering and smashing sounds were going off in the lad. Then suddenly the lights went out and the emergency back up lights kicked in, batheing everything in semi-darkness tinted with red flashing as somewhere in the building someone had set off the emergancy alarm. At this point I started to get really freaked out, and started calling out for Nick (one of the CSIs), and went out of the side room back into the lab, which was now trashed, but the monkey was no where to be seen, although I could hear it taunting me in very evil overtones. I was petrified to be alone in the room with the monkey, unable to see where it was and unable to completely see the various hazards littering the room. The exit was the other side of the room, but with the various sparks flashing around the room and the unknown whereabouts of the monkey, I was too scared to attempt to get across to it. So, I saw a door pretty much next to me, and I "escaped" through it, not sure where it was going. It opened onto a long corridor, flanked by offices and labs. To scared to waste time by closing the door behind me, I just ran down this corridor, shouting out for help and looking for Nick, but with the strong impression that the monkey was hot on my heals...
And that was pretty much when I woke up, heart pounding! All in all, a very strange, disturbing dream. I get the setting, as I was watching CSI last night before bed, but I totally don't get the monkey or the nightmarish turn! Mmmm, how bizarre. But now, on with my weekend.
I was in some sort of lab, with a couple of the CSI (Vegas) crew, and we were conducting an experiment of sorts, you know, like they do. Our experiment was awful, and certainly not something I'd condone, and it's also where this all gets a little surreal. We had this monkey on the countertop, it wasn't like any actual monkey I've ever seen, it was highly stylised - very, very thin and drawn out. We were forcing it to consume various toxins, to see which ones induced vomiting (told you it was awful). It was vomiting up very politely into a little funnel. And then in between different trials, it started talking to me. It was very articulate and clearly highly educated. Then the lab tech and the CSIs left me, having just given a last dose to the monkey. As they were leaving, they told me that I should ensure that the monkey was secure, which was when I noticed that there was a system to chain a leashlike device between the monkey and the counter. They also joked that I should be careful in case the things we were giving the monkey made it turn on us. So I turned to the monkey to see if I could secure it, wondering how I was going to work it. But the monkey, busy chatting to me, obligingly did it for me... which I remember thinking was very strange, and kind of defeating the point of securing it, if it was able to work the mechanism itself. He was also going on about what the CSIs had said about him turning on me, almost as if he was offended by the way they had talked about him. Then as I was tidying up, he started joking about going crazy, and mocking me about how I would react. Then I was getting rid of a syringe in a little side room, I chucked it from the door, but missed the container. At that point, the monkey freed himself from the leash and started having some sort of fit and making general demonic sounds. I told him to stop being silly and that it wasn't funny, and I went into the room, not thinking much of the monkey's cruel joke. As I was bending down to pick up the syringe to place it properly in it's disposal container, all this this cluttering and smashing sounds were going off in the lad. Then suddenly the lights went out and the emergency back up lights kicked in, batheing everything in semi-darkness tinted with red flashing as somewhere in the building someone had set off the emergancy alarm. At this point I started to get really freaked out, and started calling out for Nick (one of the CSIs), and went out of the side room back into the lab, which was now trashed, but the monkey was no where to be seen, although I could hear it taunting me in very evil overtones. I was petrified to be alone in the room with the monkey, unable to see where it was and unable to completely see the various hazards littering the room. The exit was the other side of the room, but with the various sparks flashing around the room and the unknown whereabouts of the monkey, I was too scared to attempt to get across to it. So, I saw a door pretty much next to me, and I "escaped" through it, not sure where it was going. It opened onto a long corridor, flanked by offices and labs. To scared to waste time by closing the door behind me, I just ran down this corridor, shouting out for help and looking for Nick, but with the strong impression that the monkey was hot on my heals...
And that was pretty much when I woke up, heart pounding! All in all, a very strange, disturbing dream. I get the setting, as I was watching CSI last night before bed, but I totally don't get the monkey or the nightmarish turn! Mmmm, how bizarre. But now, on with my weekend.
Oh Christmas tree, oh christmas tree!
Yay, FINALLY got organised enough to do this:
Still have a couple of decorations that I need to let dry and pop on the tree, and I'm still debating if I should make a star for the top, and if I should (decorate? and) use the snowflakes I made a while back with Mary. I'll get it all finished eventually! I was so excited to finally get it up. It really feels like Christmas is getting close now. So seasons greetings everyone!
I've almost used up both the balls of wool I brought yesterday, and I've discovered I'll need another one. Bugger! I only justified getting this wool (which is gorgeous and I lust after everytime I go to the wool shops) as I thought, although quite expensive, I'd only need the two. Now costs have just gone up by 50%! But I don't really mind as it is gorgeous, so pretty and vibrant, I'm fairly sure that it will be adequately loved by the eventual recipient and I'm so happy with how it's worked up so far. (I'll put up pictures after the intended has recieved it.) Ohhh dear. Seems like my wool addiction has got the better of me... again!
And thank goodness it's Friday. I'm just so ready to get this week out of the way. I'm much, much better now, just mainly the sinus headaches that are bugging me now. I've got quite a busy weekend ahead. I really, really need to tidy my flat - vacuum, recycling (for some reason, when I put my recycling out, it doesn't get picked up, so I end up storing it up and then taking it to the local supermarket), tidy away the crafting stuff (ready to make more decorations next year. Yipee!). I also have two shifts at work, which I really am grateful about, because my MOT is due in the next couple of weeks, so any money will be coming in handy! I'm just hoping I won't be feeling to lousy or headachy because that would just make for very long, horrid shifts. And finally, one of my old uni friends is coming to visit us in Bristol, so Mary has arranged for a mulled wine and mince pie evening at hers tomorrow night. Just a bit annoyed that it clashes with work - why can't I actually have it all? So I'll make a mad dash from work and probably be about an hour and a half late! Just hope I have the energy for all this, the way I've felt this week makes me feel a little worried about this. But I'm determined to give it a go!
(Sorry, not the best pics ever! Bit out of focus, but you can get the idea!)
I've almost used up both the balls of wool I brought yesterday, and I've discovered I'll need another one. Bugger! I only justified getting this wool (which is gorgeous and I lust after everytime I go to the wool shops) as I thought, although quite expensive, I'd only need the two. Now costs have just gone up by 50%! But I don't really mind as it is gorgeous, so pretty and vibrant, I'm fairly sure that it will be adequately loved by the eventual recipient and I'm so happy with how it's worked up so far. (I'll put up pictures after the intended has recieved it.) Ohhh dear. Seems like my wool addiction has got the better of me... again!
And thank goodness it's Friday. I'm just so ready to get this week out of the way. I'm much, much better now, just mainly the sinus headaches that are bugging me now. I've got quite a busy weekend ahead. I really, really need to tidy my flat - vacuum, recycling (for some reason, when I put my recycling out, it doesn't get picked up, so I end up storing it up and then taking it to the local supermarket), tidy away the crafting stuff (ready to make more decorations next year. Yipee!). I also have two shifts at work, which I really am grateful about, because my MOT is due in the next couple of weeks, so any money will be coming in handy! I'm just hoping I won't be feeling to lousy or headachy because that would just make for very long, horrid shifts. And finally, one of my old uni friends is coming to visit us in Bristol, so Mary has arranged for a mulled wine and mince pie evening at hers tomorrow night. Just a bit annoyed that it clashes with work - why can't I actually have it all? So I'll make a mad dash from work and probably be about an hour and a half late! Just hope I have the energy for all this, the way I've felt this week makes me feel a little worried about this. But I'm determined to give it a go!
Friday, 11 December 2009
Progress is being made
Not a completely wasted day for a change. I forced myself into a really early bedtime last night, in bed just after 11, which is hours earlier than I've been managing. Actually manage to get a good night sleep, better than the last week or so, but still not perfect. I was awake fairly early this morning, but still didn't manage to get on the go till lunchtime. I'm still getting nasty, sinusy headaches. This morning I did a bunch of catching up on emails that I've been neglecting and trying to organise myself. I headed into the hospital just after lunch, but I never got as far as the wards. My head was just so fuzzy and not in concentrating mode. I didn't think that I would make much sense over the course of an hour long clerking. So I did some research that I've been meaning to do for the last week whilst I was off, and I got a new swipe card, something else that I've been meaning to do for a while. I was a bit annoyed at myself for not having clerked, but I do feel that I was pro-active about other stuff, and this was a huge improvement on the last few days. So, only a small "yay!".
I also got paid today. Not much, as it was only one shift's worth, but enough to justify giving myself a treat, so I went shopping for my Christmas tree, and did grocery shopping, hopefully enough to see me through to Christmas holidays, and got some more wool (lalala!) for a special pressie for someone special. And I stupidly decided to treat myself to a trip to the cinema. Boy, did I regret this. I picked Orson Welles and Me, and it was the closest I've ever come to walking out on the cinema. I nipped to the loo and totally didn't feel like I was missing out! I only stayed because I thought that since I spent the money, I should stick it out. Mmmm.... Zac Efron may look pretty to some, but I really didn't rate his acting! The story was slow and didn't really hold my attention. Well, that'll teach me!
So, tomorrow's course of action - clerk!!! (Mary has found me someone who she says is pretty good.) Tutorial in the afternoon, then all things Christmasy in the evening - decorating my tree and my cake. :) Can't wait! Glad to be finally getting round to it!
I also got paid today. Not much, as it was only one shift's worth, but enough to justify giving myself a treat, so I went shopping for my Christmas tree, and did grocery shopping, hopefully enough to see me through to Christmas holidays, and got some more wool (lalala!) for a special pressie for someone special. And I stupidly decided to treat myself to a trip to the cinema. Boy, did I regret this. I picked Orson Welles and Me, and it was the closest I've ever come to walking out on the cinema. I nipped to the loo and totally didn't feel like I was missing out! I only stayed because I thought that since I spent the money, I should stick it out. Mmmm.... Zac Efron may look pretty to some, but I really didn't rate his acting! The story was slow and didn't really hold my attention. Well, that'll teach me!
So, tomorrow's course of action - clerk!!! (Mary has found me someone who she says is pretty good.) Tutorial in the afternoon, then all things Christmasy in the evening - decorating my tree and my cake. :) Can't wait! Glad to be finally getting round to it!
Wednesday, 9 December 2009
Another wasted day
This is getting rediculous. I'm getting so frustrated and fed up with this all. I just want to get back on with things, but no, I'm stuck feeling rubbish and tired. I need to get back to normality, this is starting to get me down. I'm missing on so much time at uni, but I've been feeling too exhausted or sick to do it. I'm stuck here doing this stupid repeat year because I was disorganised and didn't clerk enough to practise adequately for my long case, and now, I'm in a similar situation - I've not clerked now for ages, and I feel like it's all running away from me. And I know that I'm feeling down and frustrated, so this is making me lean to the negative side of things, but still, enough already. I just need to summon up the motivation to get through the next week and a half of uni, then a long weekend of work, then I'm home for Christmas. It seems so close, yet so far away at the same time. At this rate, I'll just be getting back into the swing of things and then I'll have to stop for the break. I'm looking forward to it sooooo much, but it will be even more time lost.
Anyways, rant over, I just really need to get a good night sleep, something which has remained rather elusive over the last few days.
On to other news, I got the results of the first stage of my job application form. I already knew that I was going to get a place in the Severn Foundation School, as I had been offered this on the basis of having had a place in a job programme in Severn from last year. So, maybe that's why I've been fairly indifferent to it this year. Last year, it was so much excitment (both negative and positive) but this year... I feel more like I'm on the outside looking in as I saw everyone at my tutorial today being all excited and chattering and exchanging gossip. Did not help with my feeling of disconnection that I've been experiencing today! Also, I was slightly disappointed, I didn't score very well, I don't really know if I would have made it in if I didn't have a secured place. Part of this is based on the fact that I lost out on a bunch of points becuase of repeating, I was placed in the bottom quartile of the year, when last year, my "true" quartile was the second one (we get a large part of our score based on which quartile of the year we are ranked). I think overall, my answers scored very similar to last year, maybe slightly less, so yet another frustration about having to repeat.
So, all in all a wasted day, I didn't clerk, my tutorial was cancelled last minute after having trekked all the way in, I barely knitted, in fact, spent more of the day feeling exhausted, coughing, blowing my nose and feeling sorry for myself than anything else. Must fight and try very hard to get myself out of this rut... but I have a feeling I've said that recently and it's not materialised. I can but hope.
Anyways, rant over, I just really need to get a good night sleep, something which has remained rather elusive over the last few days.
On to other news, I got the results of the first stage of my job application form. I already knew that I was going to get a place in the Severn Foundation School, as I had been offered this on the basis of having had a place in a job programme in Severn from last year. So, maybe that's why I've been fairly indifferent to it this year. Last year, it was so much excitment (both negative and positive) but this year... I feel more like I'm on the outside looking in as I saw everyone at my tutorial today being all excited and chattering and exchanging gossip. Did not help with my feeling of disconnection that I've been experiencing today! Also, I was slightly disappointed, I didn't score very well, I don't really know if I would have made it in if I didn't have a secured place. Part of this is based on the fact that I lost out on a bunch of points becuase of repeating, I was placed in the bottom quartile of the year, when last year, my "true" quartile was the second one (we get a large part of our score based on which quartile of the year we are ranked). I think overall, my answers scored very similar to last year, maybe slightly less, so yet another frustration about having to repeat.
So, all in all a wasted day, I didn't clerk, my tutorial was cancelled last minute after having trekked all the way in, I barely knitted, in fact, spent more of the day feeling exhausted, coughing, blowing my nose and feeling sorry for myself than anything else. Must fight and try very hard to get myself out of this rut... but I have a feeling I've said that recently and it's not materialised. I can but hope.
Tuesday, 8 December 2009
Getting better
Yay, finally feeling like the end is in sight. I am aiming to make some progress on returning to routine tomorrow. I had the most awful night sleep - I was still wide awake at about 5.30 this morning, having tried everything - paced my flat, read, lay in the darkness, read, lay in the darkness, played on my DS, finally around quarter to six my eyes began to feel heavy. What wonderful stuff! And to make things worse, the competency assessment (a one on one session) that I thought was tomorrow, was actually today - had to get up at 9.30 to get myself presentable. You do the maths! And then was late to it anyway, and when I was there, I must have been spiking a temp, I couldn't stop feeling all hot and bothered and sweating, even though apparently everyone else had been complaining that they were cold in that room. So much for my efforts to look presentable!
Needless to say, I made a swift exit from the hospital at that point. Walked back to my car (up a nasty steep hill - great for cooling down!) in the rain, and without my coat on, desperate to cool down! Mary had invited me to go sniffle on her sofa. She had the day off, as she had some wisdom teeth out yesterday under general anaesthetic. Brave girl taking on my sneezes, nose blowing and whining about my headaches. We just chilled out on the sofa recuperating and watching mind numbing daytime telly, and every now and then, I did some half-hearted knitting when my headache would allow such things. I was grateful for the company, and always it was lovely to hang out with Mary. Definitely a true friend who will put up with your illness indulgences and moans! She was even kind enough to feed me dinner! Yay, one less worry for me, which was great. Thanks Mary!
And now, I'm back home, and getting ready for bed. Definitely looking forward to a good night sleep!
Needless to say, I made a swift exit from the hospital at that point. Walked back to my car (up a nasty steep hill - great for cooling down!) in the rain, and without my coat on, desperate to cool down! Mary had invited me to go sniffle on her sofa. She had the day off, as she had some wisdom teeth out yesterday under general anaesthetic. Brave girl taking on my sneezes, nose blowing and whining about my headaches. We just chilled out on the sofa recuperating and watching mind numbing daytime telly, and every now and then, I did some half-hearted knitting when my headache would allow such things. I was grateful for the company, and always it was lovely to hang out with Mary. Definitely a true friend who will put up with your illness indulgences and moans! She was even kind enough to feed me dinner! Yay, one less worry for me, which was great. Thanks Mary!
And now, I'm back home, and getting ready for bed. Definitely looking forward to a good night sleep!
Monday, 7 December 2009
Still nothing to say!
Yup, that's it, just another day of feeling sick. Barely slept last night due to constant need to blow my nose (yuk!) and a very heavy congested headache. So needless to say, another very long lie in was necessary to catch up on those hours of missed sleep. Woke up around 2pm, and actually made it out of bed today! And did some knitting. Slowly though, as just unable to keep up the concentration for that long. And that's about it.
Have decided to give up on the snowflakes, as I really don't think that the yarn I was using was that suitable, they just ended up looking too messy. So, have gone back to knitting some small things for Christmas pressies (and to help reduce my stash!).
I don't think I'll be heading into uni tomorrow. I'm sure by then, I will be feeling much better, but I don't think quite over it all enough, and caught up on sleep enough to get through a day of looking professional and presentable. But I am aiming for Wednesday, as I have something on then that will be signed off.
Snotty goodnights to you all!
Have decided to give up on the snowflakes, as I really don't think that the yarn I was using was that suitable, they just ended up looking too messy. So, have gone back to knitting some small things for Christmas pressies (and to help reduce my stash!).
I don't think I'll be heading into uni tomorrow. I'm sure by then, I will be feeling much better, but I don't think quite over it all enough, and caught up on sleep enough to get through a day of looking professional and presentable. But I am aiming for Wednesday, as I have something on then that will be signed off.
Snotty goodnights to you all!
Sunday, 6 December 2009
Cough, splutter, sniffle, sneeze
Can you guess the general theme here. Yup, I am sick... again, or is it still? After having the energy drained out of me last week, and then a day of feeling a better, but with a sore throat, and then a day with a mostly better throat, but a sore ear (yesterday when I went to work), I've got a cold. And I'm so annoyed. Last week was more or less a write off, and now it looks like the next couple of days are going to be too. There's such divided opinions on going into the hospital when you're ill - some doctors, etc, get really annoyed about you coming in and potentially infecting already vulnerable people. Others are like "it's only a cold, get on with it". I tend to err on the side of the first one. As I do genuinely fell guilty at the thought of getting frail old biddies ill, and I once got seriously told off after trekking all the way to Bath on the bus for a clinic (didn't feel well enough to drive without sneezing and veering off the road!) and then sent home. So, I'll wait until I don't have to blow my nose every couple of minutes - can you imagine me trying to clerk "So Mr X *sneeze* why did you *sniffle* come into hospital? Excuse me one moment *blows nose*, okay continue" - sooooo reassuring for the patients!
Thank goodness I had the day off today, so I slept till nearly 2pm. This might have something to do with the fact that I was wide awake at about 5am, when the rain was pouring down creating a heck of a lot of noise. I ended up reading for ages, then sleeping on and off all morning. The only thing that made me get out of bed this afternoon was the sudden thought that the shops wouldn't be open late, so if I wanted to get some lemon juice, and something for dinner (craving fresh, filled pasta) I had better summon the energy. So, was out for about 30mins, and then following making a bit of toast, straight back into bed, watching stuff/dozing. Thank goodness for laptops! Yay! It's all I need in one easy package - staying snuggled up and able to doze, and entertainment and communication. Haven't even picked up a bit of wool! Must be the first day in months! My fingers are feeling a little restless, but don't think I could knit/crochet very well with a drowsy headache going on. Writing this blog is pushing it somewhat.
So needless to say, I have nothing to say, beyond what has already been said.
Thank goodness I had the day off today, so I slept till nearly 2pm. This might have something to do with the fact that I was wide awake at about 5am, when the rain was pouring down creating a heck of a lot of noise. I ended up reading for ages, then sleeping on and off all morning. The only thing that made me get out of bed this afternoon was the sudden thought that the shops wouldn't be open late, so if I wanted to get some lemon juice, and something for dinner (craving fresh, filled pasta) I had better summon the energy. So, was out for about 30mins, and then following making a bit of toast, straight back into bed, watching stuff/dozing. Thank goodness for laptops! Yay! It's all I need in one easy package - staying snuggled up and able to doze, and entertainment and communication. Haven't even picked up a bit of wool! Must be the first day in months! My fingers are feeling a little restless, but don't think I could knit/crochet very well with a drowsy headache going on. Writing this blog is pushing it somewhat.
So needless to say, I have nothing to say, beyond what has already been said.
Saturday musings
Hi! (Hi Sam, now that I know you're reading this!) So, today was a more typical sort of Saturday. It started very lazy, as I was up reading till nearly 3.30am (when did it get so late?). Didn't get out of bed till nearly 12 this morning. Oh well.... win some, loose some. I never get round to early nights. This morning, once eventually up, I started to make some progress on my snowflakes - so weird to be crocheting. The Just Soya wool is interesting to work with, it's quite soft, but the individual threads seem to seperate quite a lot, which is frustrating as I have to pay that slight bit more attention. Don't think it's the best wool to be using, but the overall effect is okay. I think I like the colour best, it's such a brilliant, pure white, that lives up to it's name "coconut"!
Four snowflakes so far, not sure how many the wool will allow. Next to them, you can see my most ambitious project - my zig-zag strippy crochet blanket that I made about three years ago. I really shouldn't be allowed to get bored! It's about double bed sized - I just carried on going until spring got too hot to allow me to work under it. You can also see to the left, my huge box of wool, currently over flowing!
Then it was off to work, thrill of thrills. It wasn't too bad, again it was one of my less favourite wards, but it was at least a better shift than last weekend. It was short staffed, but it was a smaller ward - only 20 patients so that helps. Still felt like I perhaps didn't really have time to do everything. Then one of the nurses had the cheek to get annoyed with me, when she tried to ask me to do something (menial as always, they always palm off the menial stuff on to Bank HCAs) when I tried to point out to her that I was already in the middle of doing something for one of the other nurses, when the third nurse had told me about two things she wanted me to do. I mean, come on! I've only got one pair of hands, and I feel like I'm letting down the patients enough as it is, without adding even more workload!
Then I had a very pleasant surprise when I got home - my SamSam phoned me. Had a lovely catch up and chat. Twas nice to have the company! I'm really going to hold you to that Choc Orange pudding fest, yu-ummm-my!
Progress is being made on Chistmas decorations. Since I'm still lacking a tree, I've been hanging most of my completed decorations up on my mobile - which is a present from my parents when they had visited family back in Zimbabwe a few years ago. And a mini-Stieff bear that my mom gave me as a good luck pressie for my exams a few years back. I think I'm going to get the tree tomorrow. I'm too excited to put it off any longer! Still have loads of decorations that I want to make, but at least they'll have somewhere to hang when they're ready!
I'm quite proud of this one - I sat and glued on loads of green seed beads on their side. Great texture effect.
My growing collection, which now includes a couple of the polystyrene balls.
The mess that is my dining table, a.k.a. my craft table. This pretty much sums up my life - the bright yellow paper is part of my uni timetable, there's lots of random experimentation remnants (e.g. the paper painted red), a nice smelly candle (winter berry, I think!) and part of my alcohol stash.
And finally, I've uploaded photos of the hat that I made for Mary. She wanted a slouchy hat, and choose the pattern. I got my lovely teddy to model again, because lying the hat down on a flat surface didn't allow for the full effect. Only problem is that Teddy has a smaller head than Mary, so he looks a little drowned by it!
Four snowflakes so far, not sure how many the wool will allow. Next to them, you can see my most ambitious project - my zig-zag strippy crochet blanket that I made about three years ago. I really shouldn't be allowed to get bored! It's about double bed sized - I just carried on going until spring got too hot to allow me to work under it. You can also see to the left, my huge box of wool, currently over flowing! Then I had a very pleasant surprise when I got home - my SamSam phoned me. Had a lovely catch up and chat. Twas nice to have the company! I'm really going to hold you to that Choc Orange pudding fest, yu-ummm-my!
Progress is being made on Chistmas decorations. Since I'm still lacking a tree, I've been hanging most of my completed decorations up on my mobile - which is a present from my parents when they had visited family back in Zimbabwe a few years ago. And a mini-Stieff bear that my mom gave me as a good luck pressie for my exams a few years back. I think I'm going to get the tree tomorrow. I'm too excited to put it off any longer! Still have loads of decorations that I want to make, but at least they'll have somewhere to hang when they're ready!
I'm quite proud of this one - I sat and glued on loads of green seed beads on their side. Great texture effect. 
The mess that is my dining table, a.k.a. my craft table. This pretty much sums up my life - the bright yellow paper is part of my uni timetable, there's lots of random experimentation remnants (e.g. the paper painted red), a nice smelly candle (winter berry, I think!) and part of my alcohol stash.
And finally, I've uploaded photos of the hat that I made for Mary. She wanted a slouchy hat, and choose the pattern. I got my lovely teddy to model again, because lying the hat down on a flat surface didn't allow for the full effect. Only problem is that Teddy has a smaller head than Mary, so he looks a little drowned by it!
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